Tag Archives: quaker

Happy National Cereal Day 2017: Dan’s Top 5 Obscure Cereal Mascots

Finally: now that all those Hallo-Thanks-‘mas-New-Valen-hog things are over, we can celebrate the real most wonderful time of the year.

That’s right, it’s March 7th: National Cereal Day! Today’s our day, breakfast lovers. A day when we can run a shoe buffer over our favorite shiny spoon, eat Cocoa Puffs for every meal plus dessert (which we were going to do anyway), and make fun of health-conscious cereal haters—because you don’t see kale smoothies getting their own national holiday, do you?

As usual, the Lucky Charming, Cinnamon Toasting folks at General Mills gifted me an awesome, retro-themed National Cereal Day care package. With a sturdy cereal bowl and t-shirt celebrating this holiday’s “OGs,” a suite of cereal boxes, an actual Rubik’s Cube, and more holographic plastic squiggles than their are permutations of a Rubik’s Cube, this care package is as wholesome as it is bowl-some.

Last year I celebrated National Cereal Day by counting down my favorite cereals of all time. As March 7th approached and my calendar’s ink started running under the worried grip of my sweaty mitts, I wasn’t sure how to follow this for Cerealously’s second year on the world wide web. But after looking at General Mills’s included “fun fact” sheet, it dawned on me: Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Specials. Tags: cap'n crunch, cerealously, general mills, kelloggs, national cereal day, quaker, rice krispies. Leave a comment

Jan. ’17

Review: Cap’n Crunch’s Blueberry Pancake Crunch Cereal

IHOP, matey!

Whoops, that was weird. I meant to write, “Ahoy, matey!” Sorry about that. Anyway, come on and IHOP aboard my cereal review ship, and we’ll…darn, I did it again! I really must have pancakes on my mind today.

IHOPe it doesn’t happen again.

But really, how can anyone not have pancakes stuck to their brains like syrupy griddlecakes to a plate when Cap’n Crunch’s Blueberry Pancake Crunch cereal is finally here? Sold in boxes taller than Paul Bunyan’s flapjack stacks, Blueberry Pancake Crunch combines fruity aquamarine and maple-flavored creme puffs (no, not that kind of cream puffs, sorry) to re-create a fascinatingly obscure breakfast in cereal form.

Personally, I would have preferred Buckwheat Pancake Crunch, but my pancake house menu choices are decidedly more octogenarian than most.

So while all you kids turn on Matlock for me and get off my darn lawn, I’ll pour a fresh bowl of spherical Johnnycakes. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 8 rating, cap'n crunch, maple, quaker. 23 Comments

Jan. ’17

News: Cap’n Crunch’s Blueberry Pancake Crunch Cereal is Here!

Cap'n Crunch's Blueberry Pancake Crunch Cereal Box

(Image via Quaker)

(Update: We reviewed Cap’n Crunch’s Blueberry Pancake Crunch cereal!)

SOS: get me to an IHOP, ASAP!

Why am in such an urgent pancake panic, you ask? Well our Instagram friends money0351 and Oreo Hunters tipped us off about Cap’n Crunch’s Blueberry Pancake Crunch, and just looking at it above makes my blood syrup levels plummet. I’m gonna need a buttermilk IV to keep my system from going into griddlecake gridlock.

Move aside banana #pancakes…Crunch Cakes are where it's at. #CapnCrunch pic.twitter.com/E00ile0LSW

— Cap'n Crunch (@RealCapnCrunch) December 28, 2016

Though Cap’n Crunch’s recent, drool-inducing tweet might’ve been a hint, I did not see this one coming. Just like with last summer’s Orange Creampop Crunch, it’s nearly impossible to predict what the good Cap’n’s next obscure dessert-flavored cereal will be these days. Blueberry Pancake Crunch could’ve just as easily been Maple Bacon Crunch, Syrup-Glazed Sweet Potato Crunch, or Chicken & Waffles Crunch.

Sorry, I still have maple leaves stuck in my mind—stuck with syrup, that is.

Apparently the cereal has already been spotted at Walmart and Albertsons, and it will have a nationwide release soon. Once my French toast frenzy has calmed down into a manageable flapjack fantod, you’d better believe I’m going to drive off looking for it. No rain, sleet, snow, or cloudy with a chance of meatball is going to stop me. Hey, there’s my prediction for Cap’n Crunch’s next cereal: “Spaghetti & Meatball Crunch.”

Endless thanks (even more endless than IHOP’s all-you-can-eat pancakes) go to money0351 and Oreo Hunters for the tip. If you’d like to share a fresh cereal scoop, click yourself right on over to our submissions page, or just email us at cerealously.net@gmail.com. There’s a good chance your picture could be featured on the site.

Posted by dan g.. Categories: News. Tags: cap'n crunch, maple, quaker. 10 Comments

Dec. ’16

“Review:” Cap’n Crunch’s Christmas Crunch Cereal (2016)

It was like the plot of the world’s most surreal holiday special.

Last month, I shared candid photos of 2016’s gorgeously redesigned Christmas Crunch box, with the promise that I’d wait until late December to review it—to build anticipation, Christmas cheer, appetite, etc. My decision not to buy a sleigh’s worth of Christmas Crunch when it was right there in the store’s discount basket proved to be the most foolish thing I’ve done since trading away all my Oreo Cakesters for Bosco breadsticks way back in elementary school lunch time.

Because on December 22nd, driving around in the cloak of darkness while “We Need A Little Christmas” played with bitter accuracy on the radio, I couldn’t find a single box of Cap’n Crunch’s Christmas Crunch in stores!

Several discontented web searches later, I made a desperate phone call to an obscure local grocer who confirmed that they did indeed have a few boxes left. The magical angel who worked customer service even promised to set a box aside for me—I’d wager that he doesn’t hear many late night pleas for red and green breakfast products, so any chance to satisfy a sweaty-sounding dude’s simple, yet stupid Christmas wish was a no-brainer.

And that’s the story of how I ended up with a box of the exact same Christmas cereal I eat every year. Speaking of which, let’s take our spoons out for Ho-Ho-Horatio Magellan Crunch’s holiday classic, shall we? Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 10 rating, cap'n crunch, holiday, quaker. 3 Comments

Dec. ’16

Spooned & Spotted: “It’s Finally December” Edition

For every buzz-worthy Christmas Crunch and Cinnamon Star Crunch, there are plenty of less-exciting, non-Crunch based limited edition products that make grocery shelves a little merrier from the rough period of November 1st to December 31st. So while the Cap’n and those cannibalistic stars will get plenty of time in the breakfast spotlight, I want to give a shoutout to two of the little guys.

Or in the case of Rice Krispies with Holiday Colors, three of the little guys. Snap, Crackle, and Pop’s annual offering of red and green-speckled Rice Krispies is back again for 2016, returning silently to breakfast aisles in the night like a rice-stuffed Christmas present.

That’s what the song “Silent Night” is all about, right?

I “reviewed” (translation: “played with”) Holiday Rice Krispies last year, and I encourage you all to use this cereal to make your holiday season a little holiday-ier. You could make candy cane-shaped Rice Krispies Treats like the box recommends, or you could cover a snowball entirely in Rice Krispies and chuckle as innocent passerby unknowingly bite into an Ice Krispies Treat.

Quaker’s “Limited Edition” Maple Brown Sugar Oatmeal may seem like a cop-out, as it’s just their (arguably) most famous flavor repackaged with a charming living room Christmas tree scene. I mean, they could have at least tossed in some pine nuts, right?

But I’m going to stay positive and express my love for this holiday oatmeal. I couldn’t imagine a more cozy, warm scene than the one Quaker lovingly immortalized here in cardboard. And they picked the perfect, warmly cozy flavor to pair it with.

This Maple Brown Sugar Oatmeal is just ho-ho-wholesome, and I look forward to eating it from a novelty Rudolph mug while sprawled flat on my belly under my own tree. There’s a 100% chance I’ll be reading old Garfield comics while I do it, too.

If you’ve spotted any cool limited edition breakfast products, let us know! Click yourself right on over to our submissions page, or just email us at cerealously.net@gmail.com. There’s a good chance your picture could be featured on the site.

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Specials. Tags: holiday, kelloggs, oatmeal, quaker, rice krispies, spooned & spotted. Leave a comment

Nov. ’16

Review: Quaker “Bring Your Best Bowl” Oatmeal Finalists

Wait, does this mean my “PB&J Oatmeal” idea got rejected?

And my “Double Stuf Oreo Oatmeal” idea, too? Even my “Neapolitan Oatmeal,” “Thanksgiving Leftovers Oatmeal,” and intentionally redundant “Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pie Oatmeal” ideas? All thrown in the trash heap?

Okay fine, Quaker Oats guy, I’ll accept this criminal oversight, only because the flavor finalists in your user-submitted “Bring Your Best Bowl” contest sound pretty darn good. There were over 500,000 entries for the competition earlier this year, but only three tempting tastes remain: Vanilla Chai Oatmeal, Lemon Ricotta Pancake Oatmeal, and Apple Cheddar Rosemary Oatmeal.

To pick the winner, Quaker has slapped all three finalists into a single box. It’s up to us—the humble consumers—to try ’em and vote with our taste buds here: the winner will be “saved” on shelves. Since this is a game of oatmeal life or death, I figured I’d do my civic duty and eat three breakfasts in a day. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 6 rating, 7 rating, 8 rating, non cereal, oatmeal, quaker. 16 Comments

Oct. ’16

Classic Review: Cap’n Crunch’s Sprinkled Donut Crunch

I love you, Cap’n Crunch, so I’m willing to forgive you for omitting the “ugh” from the name of your Sprinkled Donut Crunch cereal.

See, I’m a doughnut purist. Whether it’s the word’s languid length or its simple, old-world charm, “doughnut” just pleases my eyeballs more than the comparatively blunt “donut” ever could. And for all those about to tell me, “Get with the times, grandpa: writing donut is way faster,” please tell me how much time you’ve actually saved by not typing those three lovely letters. If it’s less than 5 cumulative minutes over your entire lifetime, I’m sticking with my “ugh.”

So even though I’m a little upset, after tasting Cap’n Crunch’s Sprinkled Donut Crunch, I realize the real reason there’s no “ugh” in its name: because I never let out a single exasperated “ugh” the entire time I was eating it. This cereal is darn good, and even though it was released shortly before Cerealously debuted, I’m going to make up for lost time by digging into a dozen baker’s dozens-worth of crunchy rainbow loops. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 9 rating, cap'n crunch, quaker. 13 Comments

Oct. ’16

Gimme Five…New Episodes of Cereal Time with Gabe Fonseca!

Oreo cookies! Skeletons! Mikey! Cartoon slime! The hippest sea captain you’ve ever seen!

Hopefully that grabbed your attention. It’s been a while since we last checked in with our friend Gabe Fonseca’s Cereal Time YouTube series—which spotlights a different cereal each week in a fun and nostalgic way. Decades from now, Breakfast History 101 professors will screen Gabe’s episodes as insightful windows into the cereal culture of days gone by.

Even in the twinkling, chrome future, the teachers will probably still show them on those ancient rolling TV carts, too.

To bring you up to speed on Gabe’s Cereal Time efforts, we’re going to have a viewing party for his five latest episodes. So let’s all build a blanket fort, pop some popcorn, and get cozy, because we’ve got years of memories to relive.

You did remember to bring the powdered nacho cheese topping for the popcorn, right? Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Specials. Tags: cap'n crunch, cereal time, halloween, kelloggs, monster cereals, quaker. Leave a comment