Tag Archives: pop-tarts

News: Lemon Creme Pie, Tropical Mango, Peach Cobbler, & Banana Creme Pie Pop-Tarts!

(Updated after the fact to include Banana Creme Pie)

You know what they say: good things come in threes. And pouches of two. Within boxes of eight.

No matter the quantity, this is some quality news for fans of fruity Pop-Tarts. I’ve discussed before how if you like Pop-Tarts, you’re probably in one of three camps: a Fruity Freak, a Chocoholic, or a Brown Sugar Cinnamon Purist. And for that first camp, this unexpected trio is sure to make you, well, a happy camper.

Between Lemon Creme Pie Pop-Tarts, Tropical Mango Pop-Tarts, and Peach Cobbler, only lemon and mango have appeared in Kellogg’s toaster pastried form before—in fact, Pink Lemonade Pop-Tarts are returning to shelves as we speak/drool, so I wonder what will be different about Lemon Creme Pie. Regardless, the stand-out flavor here is Peach Cobbler, marking a bold foray into the Pop-Tart world for everyone’s favorite butt-shaped fruit.

These flavors can already be found on grocer Meijer’s website, though it will likely be a few weeks before they start hitting shelves. Which of the three has got your mouth watering like a juiced melon?

After I posted this, Kellogg’s also announced Banana Creme Pie Pop-Tarts, which will be store exclusives. No word on which store yet, but since these are 16-packs, it’s probably safe to assume Walmart.

Posted by dan g.. Categories: News. Tags: kellogg's, news, pop-tarts. 5 Comments

Jan. ’21

News: Pink Lemonade Pop-Tarts Return

Pink lemonade is the oddest concept to me—you’re saying most of the stuff just adds red food coloring to normal lemonade? And that it’s mostly just homemade versions that actually add strawberry, because most commercial versions just call it, you know, Strawberry Lemonade? Talk about disappointing. The best thing pink lemonade ever got me was a Princess Peach tip card cut from the back of a Pink Lemonade Hi-C juice box. This one, to be specific:

And now Pink Lemonade Pop-Tarts are returning to reignite my pink lemonade delusions. Yes, Pink Lemonade Pop-Tarts first came out in 2016. And they were pretty good, albeit a little weird. A sour Pop-Tart is a bit unconventional—and it’s a concept that can be done extremely poorly—but PL Pop-Tarts strike a fun balance of puckering and sweetening.

So while I have mixed feelings about pink lemonade as a concept, I’ll be glad to see these on shelves again, even if I am a bit sad Kellogg’s pivoted away from the vibrant pink frosting in favor of the “Printed Fun” designs that have become more common lately. Not that these are bad, but sometimes they can be printed on the pastry cruddily, making the whole thing look like a discount brand paper towel.

Oh well: whatever it takes to bring a little summer warmth to my cold Midwest winter. You can check for Pink Lemonade Pop-Tart availability near you on Walmart.com.

Posted by dan g.. Categories: News. Tags: kellogg's, lemon, pop-tarts. Leave a comment

Dec. ’20

News: Salted Caramel Pretzel Pop-Tarts

Salted Caramel Pretzel Pop-Tarts. Has a nice ring to it.

No, seriously: I think it’s Trochaic Tetrameter—assuming you pronounce it “car-mel,” which I realize is a reckless assumption.

Let’s make one thing clear: Pretzel Pop-Tarts are pretty darn good. Like Gone Nutty Pop-Tarts before them, they shake up the crust game instead of just the flavor. Both of the line’s debut flavors, Chocolate and Cinnamon Sugar, were sweet & salty & scrumptious, so I have little doubt that Salted Caramel Pretzel Pop-Tarts will be up to the same standards. These have already been spotted on Meijer’s site—thanks to Candy Hunting for the initial tip—so they’ll probably hit shelves within a month or two.

Now that Pretzel Pop-Tarts have crossed another reasonable, if not a little uncommon, pretzel flavor pairing off their pastry to-bake list, I wonder where they’ll go next. Here’s hoping we get Peanut Butter Pretzel Pop-Tarts before Whole-Grain Mustard.

Posted by dan g.. Categories: News. Tags: caramel, kellogg's, non cereal, pop-tarts, pretzel. 1 Comment

Jun. ’20

Review: Chocolatey Churro Pop-Tarts

“An upper crust choice.” — The American Pastry Society

“A new high for the genre.” — Popular Tarts Magazine

“Do this one justice with a Stainless Steel Wolf Gourmet WGTR124S 4-Slice model.” — Toast Fancy

I’m not gonna beat around the crumbly, biscuity bush here: new Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop-Tarts are good. So good that you shouldn’t need to read my next few hundred words of assorted praise to just go out and buy a box. But nevertheless, I will do my due diligence and explain why this is the best new Pop-Tarts flavor in a long time. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: chocolate, cinnamon, kellogg's, pop-tarts. 1 Comment

Jun. ’20

Review: Appletastic Pop-Tarts Crisps

Thins. Crisps. Lite Snacks. Husks. Narrowed, flattened, and otherwise vaguely “healthified” versions of popular junk food flavors go by many names, but they share one constant: they’re never better than the originals, though one could hardly expect them to. At best, they make the toothsome tastes they’ve inherited more lithe and mobile.

I’m not sure whether portion size or convenience was the primary genesis behind Pop-Tarts Crisps—or perhaps it was heritage?—but thus far, we’ve seen three flavors of the little pastry planks hit shelves, each more okay-ish-er than the last. Now with Appletastic Pop-Tarts Crisps landing out of left field, Pop-Tarts has made the conspicuous decision to not only drop another fruity Crisps flavor, but to also make it one that’s no longer even part of the main Pop-Tart cast. While Pop-Tarts Bites have at least made noble efforts to expand the taste profile of its line’s spotlit flavors, I have to wonder whether these will be Appletastic enough to make up for not being S’Mores Pop-Tarts Crisps.

But no more blabbing: it’s time to go bobbing! Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: apple, kellogg's, non cereal, pop-tarts. Leave a comment

May. ’20

Review: Good Humor Brown Sugar Cinnamon Pop-Tarts Ice Cream Bars

Since the first Pop-Tart was piped full of sweet goo and flapped over like an Agatha Crispy book…since that first Pop-Tart thwapped out of the toaster with enough velocity to spook the family dog two feet into the air…and since the first celestially blessed starchild opened a Pop-Tart pouch to find three inside instead of two…I’ve been on this blog, prolonging the intro to an ice cream review like it’s an SAT essay to delay the inevitable post-lactose malaise of eating it.

And right on schedule, here I am: with a Good Humor Brown Sugar Cinnamon Pop-Tart bar sitting lusterlessly on a plate before me. Clearly just palette swapping the Strawberry Shortcake bars that are perhaps Good Humor’s most iconic, these Pop-Tarts bars bring the other most beloved toaster pastry flavor into the chilled spotlight of the freezer aisle.

Alright, I’ve made peace with myself and my god, and am ready to plunge deep into dire dairy digestive disarray—yes, I use alliteration as a coping mechanism. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: cinnamon, kellogg's, non cereal, pop-tarts. 1 Comment

May. ’20

Quick(ish) Review: SpongeBob Sea Berry Pop-Tarts

When you get right down to the rock bottom of it, there are really only two types of Pop-Tarts people: People who like fruity Pop-Tarts and those who prefer Chocolate Pop-Tarts. Yes, there some Pop-Tarts that can’t be easily sorted onto this continuum, but with the exception of fan-flavor-ite Brown Sugar Cinnamon (which really should be considered a member of the extended “brown sweetness” family alongside Cousin Chocolate), I can’t think of any Pop-Tart flavors beyond the choco-fruit binary that have a significant fan following. Yes, this includes Confetti Cupcake. And no, this doesn’t and in fact can’t include The Chosen One.

It was supposed to bring balance, which is why Kellogg’s destroyed it.

Long story short, I’m a chocolate Pop-Tart kind of guy. Chocolate Chip is probably my favorite of the O.G.s, while Milk Chocolate Graham forever has my heart for evicting that freeloading marshmallow from S’Mores Pop-Tarts. Yeah, I said it.

This is why, though I love classic Strawberry Pop-Tarts, I don’t think the likes of Blueberry, Cherry, and Raspberry—the latter of which I can’t remember ever having eaten more than once or twice. When Kellogg’s first tried to re-skin Raspberry Pop-Tarts as Spidey Berry Pop-Tarts, I gave them a pass. But now that Spidey Berries have been mashed en masse to produce an ocean’s worth of SpongeBob’s Sea Berries, I figured it was fate telling me to give the flavor another shot—or else the next time they came back it’d be as Beetle Juicy Pop-Tarts. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: non cereal, pop-tarts, raspberry. Leave a comment

Apr. ’20

Review: Confetti Cake Pop-Tarts Bites

Mainstays, icons, the A team: every brand’s got ’em, whether they’re flavors or sub-brands.

For Quaker cereal it’s Cap’n Crunch (and maybe Life). General Mills has Cheerios, Lucky Charms and Cinnamon Toast Crunch to do the bulk of its flavor licensing work. Post’s are arguably Honey Bunches and Pebbles, which is, itself, a two-faced Janus of Fruity & Cocoa. Likewise, Kellogg’s translates to Frosted Flakes and Froot Loops, plus Pop-Tarts, too.

As above, so below. If brand-level marketing has to tick certain option boxes, so too should a peripheral Pop-Tarts product have to do justice to what I’m calling The Big Four. Pop-Tarts’ finest. We got the higher ups in Bites form, as well as Chocolatey Fudge—which is a quasi-quintessential Pop-Tarts variety alongside Cookies & Creme.

But we’ve heard nothing about #3 & #4, S’Mores & Wild Berry. They complete this sacred quartet by further balancing rich and fruity sweetness.

No, instead of going with a proper, albeit unberried, wild card flavor like Hot Fudge Sundae or a Gone Nutty! variety, we got Confetti Cupcake Pop-Tarts Bites. Well, now it’s just Confetti Cake. Whether this was meant to be a symbolic instance of macro- vs. microcosm or not, one thing’s for certain: Confetti Cupcake Pop-Tarts were never that good to begin with. Certainly not Bites material. Heck, If I wanted a handful of bite-sized compound sugar bombs, I’d spread Cool Whip between some Frosted Animal Cookies.

But I’ve whined enough. I’ll pop open a pouch with an open mind, and give these angel-cake devils their due.

Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: kellogg's, non cereal, pop-tarts. Leave a comment