Tag Archives: non cereal

News: Cocoa & Fruity Pebbles Coffee Creamer

Listen here, theoretical gastro-physicists: cereal is a solid. Sure, you add milk to it, but some licensed tie-ins of late seem to be cutting out the middle-matter and melting cereal down to a refined, fluid form from the get-go.

And International Delight’s new Pebbles coffee creamers are no exception. Releasing in both Fruity and Cocoa varieties, I think we can safely assume one of these will be more innovative than the other. Whereas a Fruity Pebbles coffee creamer implies a unique fruity cereal flavor, I have trouble picturing the Cocoa Pebbles version being much different from the chocolate lava overflow of other cocoa–mocha creamers. Unless, somehow, they’re able to make a liquid crispy.

Both Pebbles creamers will be hitting mass retailers in early 2021, priced at around $3.29 each. This release coincides with the Pebbles brand’s 50th anniversary, a celebration Insta-foodie Markie Devo claims will also include a release of Birthday Cake Pebbles

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A post shared by Markie_devo (@markie_devo)

More on this story as it continues to bake.

Posted by dan g.. Categories: News. Tags: non cereal, pebbles, post. 2 Comments

Nov. ’20

Review: Cinnamon Toast Crunch Cinnadust

How much Cinnadust is a single Cinnamon Toast Crunch square worth? What is the measure of a “Cinnamoji’s” life? How many of them do I hold in this cylinder of absurd magnitude? Is it really true? That all we are is Cinnadust in the wind?

Cinnamon Toast Crunch is making me think way too hard for something so redundantly simple. By almost any practical measure, Cinnadust has no reason to exist. Despite its considerable girth, at $5.48 this currently Sam’s Club exclusive Cinnadust is way more expensive than grabbing a small spice jar and a 10lb bag of Domino granulated—which, given the sweetness of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, is pretty much the right ratio.

But maybe it tastes better than just cinnamon sugar, right? Maybe Cinnadust is hiding some real magic in its “other natural flavors.” Maybe this mausoleum-sized flavor shaker was worth the brave squares it sacrificed.

…maybe. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: cinnamon, general mills, non cereal, toast crunch. 1 Comment

Oct. ’20

News: Cinnamon Toast Crunch Cinnamilk

The year is 20TC: I listen to the satisfying crunch as I click with my dusty Cinnamouse to publish a new Cinneriously.net blog post about Cinnamon Toast Crunch’s latest cinnamon sugar lifestyle cinnfusion: Cinnalink, a brain chip that immediately (and constantly) triggers the neural enjoyment of eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch, all without lifting a spoon! It’s the taste you no longer need to see—though you can recreate the experience with the brand’s accompanying Cinnavision Goggles.

Yes, with over 1,000 different uses for the Cinnamon Toast Crunch essence they’ve extracted from each crazy square’s mortal soul, General Mills is just a few Cinnamon Toast Seraphims away from opening up a holy portal to the Cinnaverse’s sweet, sweet paradise. And we’re all invited over for eternal breakfast!

But that’s in the future. Right now, Cinnamon Toast Crunch has only begun its quest to literally milk the cereal’s cult status dry with peripheral products that, though ostensibly only flavored with cinnamon and sugar, still carry name brand markup. It’s especially fitting that this latest piece of Toast Crunch news, Nestle’s Cinnamilk, came out the same day I finally acquired CTC Cinnadust:

I DIDN'T EXPECT IT TO BE THIS BIG pic.twitter.com/BJX3uhmiL2

— Cerealously 🥛🥣 (@cerealouslynet) October 29, 2020

I consider this poetic because, as Nestle also makes Nesquik, I could now either a) simply drink Cinnamilk, b) mix Cinnadust and regular milk, Nesquik style, or c) mix Cinnadust and Cinnamilk to clip out of reality and into the Cinnaverse—years before General Mills’ plan to do the same. That said, there’s also the traditionalist’s option d), to eat Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal and drink the milk left behind, but who would want to do something so antiquated? It’s 2020, Grandpa: we ingest cereal in other forms of matter now. Now hook me up to my CinnamO₂n tank.

Now that I’ve spent this entire blog post wasting your time by Cinnamon Toast Chuckling at my own jokes, I’ll leave you with the one fact you probably came here for:

14oz bottles of Cinnamilk will hit mass retailers in January.

Posted by dan g.. Categories: News. Tags: cinnamon, non cereal, toast crunch. 1 Comment

Oct. ’20

Spooned & Spotted: Frankford Fruity Pebbles White Chocolate Bunny

Speak of the deviled, egged or otherwise, and they shall appear.

Just days ago, I shared news of Frankford’s freshly debuted Fruity Pebbles Candy Bar, remarking how Easter 2020’s Froot Loops White Chocolate Bunny should’ve been a Trix Rabbit. Perhaps hearing my pleas and choosing to further spurn them, Frankford already has a Fruity Pebbles White Chocolate Bunny all hopped-up and ready to go for 2021.

Yes, as I begin to make plans to consider buying materials for my Halloween costume—Thanksgiving & Christmas mere glimmers in the inevitably grueling midwest winter ahead—cereal-loving confectioners are already going hare-brained over next spring. And though the chaotic nature of 2020 makes it hard to picture how next year will look or feel—let alone taste—at least we have one Fruitily Pebbled thing to look forward to.

Well, two.

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Specials. Tags: candy, easter, non cereal, pebbles, post. 1 Comment

Oct. ’20

Spooned & Spotted: Fruity Pebbles Candy Bar

https://www.instagram.com/p/CF6-64HhkPI/?utm_source=ig_embed

Finally, a Pebbles product for guys like me who detest the low-density, appetite-exacerbating composition of the cereals themselves. No longer will I have to eat three bowls of Fruity Pebbles just to feel them in my stomach: now I can insert a whole creamy bar of the stuff into my mouth like a Super Nintendo cartridge and call it a day.

Thanks to Candy Hunting and @andyjarnold, we now know that these King Size Fruity Pebbles Candy Bars are already available at Walmart: the appropriately King-Sized retailer that tends to reign over new cereal-adjacent exclusives. It’s unclear from this photo alone whether the Pebble-paved bar is made of white chocolate or just some cheap, abstract white sugar confection, but eagle-eyed, rabbit-eared readers may remember that Frankford also released a Froot Loops White Chocolate Easter Bunny earlier this year, so it seems they just swapped one fruity cereal brand for another here.

Wait a minute—hey Frankford, if you have leeway to partner with any cereal company, why wouldn’t you make a White Chocolate Trix Bunny?

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Specials. Tags: non cereal, pebbles, post. 1 Comment

Sep. ’20

Spooned & Spotted: Barnes & Noble Café Cinnamon Toast Crunch Cookie

In a year that refuses to be read like a book, we’re getting at least one more sweet little twist of cereal-adjacent obscurity.

Starbucks—err, well only Barnes & Noble Café locations that serve Starbucks coffee—is unleashing a new cookie studded with Cinnamon Toast Crunch squares. But don’t expect a pure and chaste cereal milk & cookies experience: as one Redditor has mentioned, this cookie is a triple threat of oatmeal, cinnamon, and chocolate chip. Which, honestly, sounds a lot better. Just as Honey Maid Cinnamon Graham Cereal is basically Toast Crunch with a beefed-up base grain, so too does this cookie sound like Chocolate Toast Crunch if it were made with oat flour.

If you’ve tried this cookie, let me know what you think of it in the comments below. Personally, I’m swearing off Barnes & Noble until the disrespected ghost of Borders Books & Music tells me it’s okay.

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Specials. Tags: cinnamon, non cereal, spooned & spotted, toast crunch. 1 Comment

Aug. ’20

Review: Smartfood Cap’n Crunch’s Crunch Berries Popcorn

There is beauty in simplicity. This is known.

Example: in the 200,000ish-person city where I live, despite dozens of renowned restaurants and artisan makers, perhaps my favorite menu item is a modest egg & cheddar on ciabatta sandwich. The ability to do so much with so few ingredients never fails to blow me away and make me scramble back for more. I mean, have you seen most sandwiches these days? Their menu descriptions are borderline biblical, with so much stuff stuffed within that it’s as hard to taste anything in particular as it is to eat the thing without it prolapsing prosciutto and quarts of aioli all over your hands.

But I digress. And wipe my fingers off.

I’ll admit, when it was first announced, Smartfood’s new Cap’n Crunch’s Crunch Berries popcorn mix turned me off with its very concept. Sharp hulls and serrated Crunch Berries teaming up to shred my palate? My dental insurance is expensive enough. But now that I’ve actually got a chance to try the stuff, I’m happy to say that I was wrong, and Cap’n Crunch is a master of minimalistic munchies. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: cap'n crunch, non cereal. Leave a comment

Aug. ’20

News: Cinnamon Toast Crunch Cinnadust Seasoning Blend

Ha, good luck catching me now, legal sharks: let’s see how your eyes like…

POCKET CINNADUST!

I have reason to practice such self defense. When I first leaked news of a Cinnamon Toast Crunch seasoning blend several months ago, I immediately had to take the post down after being served a crisp Cinnamon Toast Cease & Desist Letter. Granted, it was sent not by General Mills but by a company that focus-groups new product ideas, but it is funny that this one actually came out, since a lot of products teased in programs like that never come to fruition.

I mean seriously: why Cinnadust? It’s ostensibly just cinnamon and sugar together in a spice bottle, which you can already buy, right? Well, the product’s official release also claims there are traces of vanilla and graham to be found within, which, aside from being exciting, really makes this more of a Post Honey Maid Cinnamon Graham Cereal Seasoning Blend, huh?

No matter its specific formulation, Cinnamon Toast Crunch Cinnadust is sure to have a lot of applications when it releases this September at Sam’s Club, and in 2021 everywhere else. You could wear it on your face like fake five o’clock shadow. You could pretend to sneeze it out and convince people you’re cereal-blooded.

You could even bring it to the beach and return it to nature, allowing it to mingle with fish bones and driftwood once more.

Posted by dan g.. Categories: News. Tags: cinnamon, news, non cereal, toast crunch. Leave a comment