If there’s any tangential breakfast product spin-off that needed another Darwinian evolution, it’s the cereal bar.
Following the halcyon days of the Milk ‘n’ Cereal Bar (which you can still buy at places like…Staples?), most modern cereal bars are basically just airy candy/granola bar hybrids. Which isn’t a bad thing—it’s still the only way to experience a different flavor of Golden Graham—but I’m generally in the mood to choose one of those two extremes, or split the difference with a Clif Bar so I can at least feel like I’m scaling a daunting crag whilst lying perfectly horizontal.
But the cereal bar’s next munchable mutation is far more exciting. General Mills—pretty much the only cereal company still making bars of mainline cereals—has launched new Marshmallow Blondie Lucky Charms Soft-Baked Treats, which have already been spotted at BJ’s, Walmart, and Sam’s Club.
Though I’m no-doubt excited about these sugar-drizzled blondies—their fossilized layers of marshmallows remind me of the swirling sugar stew that was Lucky Charms Oatmeal—they do look a lot like General Mills’ Fiber One Bars. So will these magically delicious blondies also be digestively rigorous? That remains to be seen. But whether or not Lucky will be keeping my intestines plucky, I’m all for buying a value-pack of these bricks and mortaring ’em up with ice cream ’til they hit the ceiling.
