Tag Archives: general mills

Review: Sesame Street 1-2-3 Berry & C is for Cinnamon Cereals

New Sesame Street Cereal Review - Boxes

Puppets? I hate puppets. They’re unnatural, uncanny facsimiles of reality that populate my personal hell alongside dolls and ventriloquist dummies—this is all your fault, R.L. Stine!

But Muppets? Okay, they’re cute and therefore get a pass. In fact, I like to think that every valiant Muppet is the sworn blood enemy of creepy puppets everywhere. Go ahead, try and find me a Muppet without forward-facing eyes. These felted folks are predators. Therefore, it is my gratitude toward the Muppets that’s inspired me to review Sesame Street’s two new cereals.

Or at least, that’s how I internally justify being a grown man writing about a breakfast product for young children.

These cereals, 1-2-3 Berry and C is for Cinnamon, are both on shelves now. But are they worth throwing on your Cookie Monster snapback and driving down your street for?

Continue reading

Review: Pokémon Berry Bolt Cereal

New Pokémon Cereal Review - Berry Bolt Box

The only thing more legendary than Pokémon video games has gotta be Pokémon foodstuffs. As a collection-based ’90s series that turns kids crazed, it’s no surprise that the popping technicolor likes of Pokémon Pop-Tarts and Eggo Waffles were manufactured in droves—and it’s even less surprising that these nifty little snacks had huge nostalgic impacts. In fact, my own personal obscure favorites when growing up were the Pokémon lollipops my mom would buy me at the pharmacy, each of which came with a sticker.

Also among these licensed gems was the unforgettable Pokémon Cereal. With a solid Lucky Charms imitation as its base, Bowl Pal toys inside and the kind of glimmering box embossment that blows holographic Charizard out of the magma, Pokémon Cereal is a sentimental favorite of countless ’90s kids. And lest we forget the adorable pastel marshmallows—artist Tomodachi makes pins of them and I’ll take every opportunity to promote them.

In short, Pokémon Cereal (and by extension the newly marshmallowed Pokémon: The Movie 2000 Cereal) is a hard act to reboot, since the Pokémania of its Y2K heyday will never be matched. That’s probably why it’s taken two decades and a different brand licensee to get another cereal based on Pokémon. This one’s called Berry Bolt Pokémon Cereal, and while I think the box art is seriously lacking in both embossment and Poké-species diversity, I’m here to, without bias, choo-chew-choose you, Pikachu, to do battle in my bowl. Let’s go! Continue reading

Review: Dunkaroos Cereal

New Dunkaroos Cereal Review - Box

When it comes to Saturday mornings and cartoons, cereal is the undisputed king of whimsical childhood nostalgia. But cereal isn’t just one thing. It’s a sesquicentennial constellation of countless different varieties, flavors, and mascots. That’s why it’s so impressive how Dunkaroos, a single snack consisting of vanilla cookies and rainbow frosting for dunking, has amassed about the same nostalgic clout as every cereal combined.

Seriously, look up any list of old comfort foods people want to save from discontinuation and Duncan the Kangaroo will be there in all his totally tubular glory. Of course, unless you’ve been living under the rock-hard mummified remains of vintage ’90s Dunkaroos frosting, you probably already know that Dunkaroos are back, and have been for almost a year now. As part of this Dunkaromantic revival, General Mills has also released Dunkaroos cookie dough, Dunkaroos yogurt, and more—like the confetti-infused cookie discs in the Dunkaroos Cereal I’m reviewing today.

I’ll be honest: I’m hesitant about this stuff to begin with. Vanilla and birthday/confetti cake flavors are notorious for leading to boring, one-note-sweet cereals. Pair that with how similar Dunkaroos looks to GM’s mediocre Funfetti Cereal, and you’ve got a recipe for molar-melting disappointment.

But hey, you never know ’til you dunk, right? Follow along as I go spoon deep. Continue reading

Review: Chocolate Churro Cinnamon Toast Crunch

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Chocolate Churro Cereal Review Box

What makes a good cereal shape? For the overwhelming most part, cereal pieces fall into three categories: puffs, flakes, and squares. Sure, there are plenty of exceptions, from your basic puffed rice to the geometric marvel that is the stuffed Krave pillow, but I don’t believe my palate’s ever encountered anything else quite like Cinnamon Toast Crunch Churros.

While most of my cheers and jeers about this noodly cereal medium can be found in my original review for plain CTC Churros, they’re worth reiterating as I dive into this vaguely cylindrical Chocolate sequel. Continue reading

Review (x2): Chocolate Strawberry Cheeros & Multigrain Cheerios with Strawberries!

New Chocolate Strawberry Cheerios and Multigrain Cheerios with Strawberries Cereal Review - Boxes

Are strawberries anyone else’s favorite fruit? Don’t get me wrong, I love just about every fruit—pears can rot in the dry, mealy ground for all I care. But there’s something about the perfect pop-ability, late spring–early summer vibes, and shortcake satisfaction of strawberries. It doesn’t hurt that artificial strawberry is the best fake fruit flavor, too.

Seriously, if y’all got any pink Laffy Taffy laying around, chuck ’em in the general direction of Michigan.

Because I like strawberries so much, I will never turn down a new strawberry cereal. So when Cheerios introduced both Chocolate Strawberry and Multigrain with Strawberries varieties, I knew I had to tackle both in one straw-some ode of a review to my favorite, rosily plump fruit. After all, plain ol’ Strawberry Cheerios were amazing, so what could go wrong, right? Continue reading

News: Golden Grahams & Cinnamon Toast Crunch Protein Bars

General Mills New Golden Grahams Protein Bar

It seems 2021 will be the year of, in addition to many other things, buff cereal products. First Pebbles drops protein powder, now General Mills is getting into the protein bar game. What’s next, Kellogg’s Raisin Bran energy gel?

To be fair, General Mills’ Golden Grahams and Cinnamon Toast Crunch protein bars look pretty appetizing, and 20 grams of protein feels pretty standard for the likes of Power Bars or Quest Bars. I’m glad they committed to making a muscle-building munchie instead of a weird, sugary Clif Bar type of hybrid. They can save that idea for Lucky Charms.

You can already find the bars listed on General Mills’ Foodservice and Convenience website, so if you’re trying to track down these cereal protein bars, it seems like gas stations or school cafeterias would be your best bet. Whichever’s easiest.

What do you think? Cereal protein bars: yes or no? Personally, I’ll be defeating the Golden Graham bar’s purpose with a jar of marshmallow fluff.

Quick Review: Cinnamon Toast Crunch Soft Baked Bars

New Cinnamon Toast Crunch Soft Baked Bars Review Box

When it comes to Quick Reviews on this blog, I have a sordid history: 98% of the time that I title a post “Quick Review,” I end up removing the word “Quick” after effortlessly coasting past the 500-word mark. But this time, with Cinnamon Toast Crunch Soft Baked Bars, I’m committed to making this, perhaps, my shortest review ever. Why? Let me give you a few quick reasons: Continue reading

News: Wonderworks Keto Friendly Cereal | Chocolate, Peanut Butter, & Cinnamon

New Wonderworks Keto Friendly Cereal from General Mills Boxes

If you follow cereal news, one thing you quickly learn is that January is the December of joyous new breakfast tidings. For whatever reason, cereal companies love to ring in the New Year by announcing a dozen or more products in one bulk batch. This usually leaves my poor fingers aching as I try to cover everything in one mega post, but thankfully—at least for General Mills’ January announcement—I’ve covered just about everything already.

Everything but the above three cereals—probably the only three in General Mills’ Class of ’21 that won’t sabotage your Resolution. Continue reading