Tag Archives: frosted flakes

24

May. ’22

Review: Strawberry Milkshake Frosted Flakes & Cinnamon French Toast Frosted Flakes

New Frosted Flakes Cereal Boxes

Note: though Chocolate is included in this lineup of new boxes, I won’t be reviewing it here, since it’s unchanged. You can find my original review here.

Tony, my man. Can I call you Tony Baloney?

No?

How about Riga-Tony? Tonyboy? Tony Island Mile-High Chili Dogs?

Alright, fine, let’s just get down to business…Anthony. Fact of the matter is, I’m impressed. You’re really embracing your right brain lately. I know it can be tempting to trust your business sense and realize that you could probably finance the entire Frosted Flakes brand interminably just by cheaply chucking in new marbits and mixing together existing cereals. But as much of a smart tiger as you are, I can tell you’re truly an artist at heart. And an athlete, too—geez, no wonder the Twitter furries thirsted you off the platform: you’ve got it all!

You’re so creatively inclined that you decided to bless us with not one, but two twinkling new cereal flavors—and neither have chintzy, redundant marshmallows! Sure, my bar for being impressed by new cereals has limboed lower and lower over the past purgatorial half year of lazy cereal-smithing, but hey, I’m going to stay positive and tackle the Strawberry Milkshaked and Cinnamon French Toasted fruits of your labor with gusto. Continue reading →

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24

Mar. ’22

News: Three New Frosted Flakes Flavors

New Frosted Flakes Flavors

Wow-wee, golly-gee! Changing the color and flavor of milk? You mean the thing every single cereal ever does?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m totally excited for these new Frosted Flakes flavors. I just think it’s a little silly that in-milk alchemy is the principle selling point, since unless your cereal is changing the milk an entirely different color from the cereal pieces themselves, the flavor and pigment infusion of endmilk is pretty much an expected feature at this point.

Rather, it’s the actual Frosted Flavors here that have piqued my interest. Sure, Chocolate Frosted Flakes are far from new, but it seems Kellogg’s is aiming to improve the formula, calling it “better than ever, with traditional corn flakes, sweet cocoa and vanilla flavor.” As far as I know, the titillating promise of vanilla is new here.

The real interesting ones are Strawberry Milkshake, packing “a ripe and juicy strawberry flavor coupled with rich, creamy notes,” and Cinnamon French Toast: “the perfect combination of caramelized brown sugar and maple syrup flavor with warm cinnamon spice on golden toasted corn flakes.”

Though simply sugared Frosted Flakes don’t immediately strike me as the ideal vessel for such nuanced flavors, I’m intrigued enough to check give this whole tasty triumvirate a try when it hit shelves in May.

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18

Jun. ’21

Bite-Sized Reviews: Team Cheerios, Kellogg’s Mashups, & Cap’n Crunch’s Chocolatey Churros

A picture may be worth a thousand words, but I couldn’t think of nearly that many to say about these three new, but mostly predictable, cereals.

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26

Apr. ’21

Bite-Sized Review: Shaq & Tony’s Frosted Flakes with Cinnamon Basketballs

The latest nosh from my perennially overflowing pantry.

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03

Mar. ’21

News: Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes + Apple Jacks Mashups

New Kellogg's Frosted Flakes and Apple Jacks Mashups Cereal Box

Just look at this box art and tell me it doesn’t make you want a Kellogg’s All-Stars Battle Royale game. I’d totally main the Raisin Bran sun until they eventually have to nerf him for being celestially OP.

Dream brawlers aside, the second entry in Kellogg’s fighters pass of mashed-up cereals has been announced and it’s…a bit of a clunker. Frosted Flakes + Apple Jacks isn’t exactly an innovative evolution from Frosted Flakes + Froot Loops. My personal new cereal hopes are frequently dashed, but I didn’t think it that unrealistic to expect Kellogg’s to try two totally different mix-ins this time around.

Like Corn Pops + Honey Smacks, maybe. Or Krave + Cocoa Krispies. Anything but Frosted Flakes again, since it adds very little to a two-cereal fusion. It basically just “Yes, and”s the other one’s sweetness, and that’s what I expect from Frosted Flakes + Apple Jacks. It’s not often that I’m outright dismissive of a cereal from the get-go, but since this Mashup is about as predictable as a new cereal can be, Frosted Flakes + Apple Jacks is going to have to twist fate and unlock some arcane flavor magic to impress me.

If you need any more reasons to temper your appetite, here’re two: Shaq’s Frosted Flakes with Crispy Cinnamon Basketballs are already the exact same thing, with the added bonus of getting to say the phrase “Crispy Cinnamon Basketballs.” Not to mention how Cinnamon Frosted Flakes exist, yet neither this Mashup nor Shaq’s cereal makes use of them. Since Cinnamon Frosted Flakes and Apple Jacks have very different cinnamon interpretations, that could’ve actually been fun!

Oh well. By the way, if you want to play an actual cereal fighting game, Cereal Killaz is a cool indie project to consider helping fund!

When it comes out, I’m totally gonna pick Sonnie 2 Shanks and 1v1 a Kellogg’s marketing exec. Winner picks the next Mashup!

 

 

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18

Feb. ’21

News: Shaq & Tony’s Frosted Flakes with Crispy Cinnamon Basketballs

New Shaq Frosted Flakes with Crispy Cinnamon Basketballs

Kazaam. “That’s How I Beat Shaq.” Shaq Fu. And my personal favorite: Soda Shaq. The list of Shaquille O’Neal’s off-the-wall escapades and cross-promotions nearly eclipses his countless on-the-court accomplishments. Between Shaq’s philanthropy and a genial personality as tall as he is, the guy’s just lovable—which is why, when I heard about Shaq’s new Frosted Flakes, my first thought was, “That’s awesome!”

Then my second thought was, “I have no idea who thought this needed to exist, but…it’s awesome!”

And it turns out this cereal, releasing in April, exists for a reason. The out-of-nowhere alley-oop between Shaq and Tony the Tiger will benefit Mission Tiger, which aims to help one million kids get better access to sports.

Beyond its wholesome aims and sugary flavor, Tony & Shaq’s team-up scores points for using the unprecedented phrase “Crispy Cinnamon Basketballs.” Crispy Cinnamon Basketballs. Gets funnier every time I say it.

If I’m nitpicking, I’ll say it’s a little disappointing that these cinnamon puffs didn’t get mixed in with Cinnamon Frosted Flakes for a spicy–sweet double feature. Nevertheless, I’m interested to see how these cinna-spheres spoon when they bounce onto shelves in a couple months.

Now please, universe: bring back Soda Shaq!

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29

Dec. ’20

Quick Review (x2): Kellogg’s Froot Loops & Frosted Flakes Cereal Bars

New Froot Loops and Frosted Flakes Cereal Bars Review

“Hop to it, wee one!” — Dotty, of Animal Crossing fame.

Ever since I read this quote in-game, it has played in my head during laborious moments of great urgency. And covering every new cereal hitting shelves this January, by the end of January? That’s no wee effort. Thus, I must get hopped up on sugar to  review what I already have, as fast as I can.

Many a bowl’s work ahead of me, I’m starting with a straightforward new release. These Froot Loops & Frosted Flakes Cereal Bars are already out, but are they worth squaring off with at breakfast-time? I’ll make it clear: yes and no. That is, these Froot Loops Cereal Bars are wonderful, while the Frosted Flakes version leaves a lot to be desired. Allow me to elaborate: Continue reading →

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12

Dec. ’20

News: Two New Kellogg’s Cereals, Two New Kellogg’s Cereal Bars

New Cinnamon Roll Frosted Mini-Wheats and Blueberry Special K Cereals

While General Mills dropped their entire Early 2021 cereal lineup in one concentrated dump of rendered cardboard, Kellogg’s is sharing their New Year’s offerings in drips & drabs. with each of the products pictured here hitting headlines across the past week or so.

First we have two cereals on opposing ends of the sugary–healthy cereal spectrum. Cinnamon Roll Frosted Mini-Wheats clearly has no reservations about frosting full-gloss, twinkling and gooey cinna-bun flavor atop its thatched squares. Granted, Frosted Mini-Wheats variants often aren’t flavored that potently, regardless of how rich their dessert inspirations may be. In fact, while I’m sure Cinnamon Roll Frosted Mini-Wheats will taste just fine, this isn’t entirely new territory for the brand. Cinnamon Roll Frosted Mini-Wheats Little Bites were around in 2012, and I’m a firm believer in the superior flavor of Mini-Mini-Wheats—simply because they have a higher frosting-to-wheat ratio.

Likewise, Special K with REAL WHOLE BLUEBERRIES seems kind of like a downgrade from Blueberry and Lemon Clusters Special K, which may not have had whole blueberries, but it had freakin’ yogurt clusters. That’s way more deserving of an obnoxiously all-caps box banner. But hey, it’ll probably also taste alright, if not good! Continue reading →

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