What’s the cure for a stressful schedule? Stack up your queue and call it a day.

Yes, The Empty Bowl is back after a brief, technologically stymied hiatus, and cohost Justin McElroy and I have brought a number of appropriately hollow platitudes with it. The latest appetizing apparition in our meditative cereal mirage of a podcast, Eight is pretty much my favorite episode yet.

On the menu this time? Morning mystery meats, massive quantities of powdered sugar, and a cereal myth so sweet you could hang your (clearly labelled) hat on it. To that last point, anyone curious to see the SPOILER ALERT…Quaker PB & J replica box discussed can find it here.

If this is your first trip to our great cereal bowl in the sky, you can find more 20–30 minute delectable de-compression chambers at our Anchor hub, follow along on Twitter, or send in a listener question. We can’t discuss or respond to every email, but I assure you that each one still subconsciously informs my shopping lists (so be sure to subliminally mention doughnuts more often—and maybe cauliflower, for balance).

I don’t mean to brag, but this is my mom’s favorite episode yet.

Or maybe least favorite, as The Empty Bowl’s seventh journey into the pearly milk gates of calming cereal paradise covers my biggest childhood cereal influence’s debatably unjust disposal of preciously Honey Bunched goodness.

But while I (lovingly!) wait for her testimony, allow me to remind you as always of our podcast’s goal. Hosted by Justin McElroy and myself, The Empty Bowl is your roughly biweekly snack of sweetly serialized and cerealized catharsis. In addition to cereal dust drama, Seven explores Cap’n Crunch’s latest tempting treasures, my second Walmart walk of shamelessness, and some truly questionable* Pop-Tart copywriting.

*I don’t mean to say I could do any better, but I did once invent a clever term** for when people wrongly interpret other brands as better than Pop-Tarts.

Thank you all for the continued support and kind words about the podcast. If you’d like to subscribe or support the show, you can visit our Anchor hub, follow along on Twitter, or send in a listener question. All relevant Honey Bunches of Oats grievances will be forwarded to our most crisply suited breakfast lawyers.

**It’s “misconstruedel.”

Happy Thanksgiving!

What better holiday to listen to a relaxing cereal podcast than the one dedicated to filling every gastrointestinal crevasse with carbs and assorted birds before torpedoing into the couch ’til the leftover green bean casserole beckons us to start the cycle anew?

If you’re ready for some post-stuffing cereal stuff, stuff your ears with the latest episode of The Empty Bowl! On this show, my ever-tranquil co-host Justin and I turkey trot through all of this fall’s winter-wishlist-length cereal news stories, ponder the construction of Cocoa Puffs with Marshmallows, and do a nostalgic throwback to some of our favorite dearly departed and discontinued cereals.

While you wait for the tryptophan to kick in, you can support and subscribe to the show here, and follow T.E.B. on Twitter here. Every retweet and cent is deeply appreciated, so our cereal mantras can echo farther across the Cocoa Puff-shaped globe.

Speaking of gratitude, I’m so thankful for everyone who reads this site, listens to our podcast, or interacts with Cerealously on social media. I’ve said it countless times, but the warm reception each article and episode gets is what keeps me doing this. So eat an extra dinner roll or bowl of Thanksgivingish cereal for me, and to paraphrase Justin:

Don’t forget to drink the gravy.

Need to chill out? Boy, do we have a cool glass of milk for you.

Or maybe not: on episode 4 of The Empty Bowl—our soothing (emphasis on the O’s) cereal podcast—Justin and I talk about the perks and irks surrounding dry cereal. Other topics include the widely heralded return of Sugar Cookie Toast Crunch, the mathematical inconsistencies of XL Cap’n Crunch, and the upcoming debut of a certain sweet and sour cereal.

As always, we deeply appreciate the positive feedback we’ve received on the show. If you’re interested in helping better spread our breakfast zen across the world, subscribing, rating, retweeting, donating, or simply telling your grandma about the show would mean so much to the both of us.

You can also send us questions and feedback over email—unfortunately we can’t promise discussions on every kind letter we receive, but know that every message is read and heartfully valued.

Until next time, don’t forget to drink the milk—or, you know, intentionally forget the milk and eat it dry.

Tuesdays are tough. This is known.

Monday’s trickling fountainhead of leftover weekend euphoria has dribbled its last drop of libidinal residue, yet the hump day, the harbinger of home stretches, hasn’t even begun.

It’s a day that’s too long, too hopeless, and too…Tuesday. I know I’ve spent my fair share of workday 3pm hours aimlessly Googling Pottery Barn coupons and “Which Sailor Scout are You?” personality quizzes*, so I feel obligated to help others get through the week’s second-day slog.

And what better way to do that than by sharing Episode 3 of my and Justin McElroy’s break(fast)-out podcast, The Empty Bowl.

For the unenlightened (emphasis on the enlightenment), The Empty Bowl aims to bring calm and zen to your day by focusing on the meditative nature of everyone’s favorite** milked breakfast food.

The echoing clink of a struck bowl. The tranquil drip of an overflowing spoon. The delicate odyssey of a back-of-box word search. All are fair game on The Empty Bowl, and in this episode we bring a litany of cereal rumors (some recently demystified), a taste of Trix, and a few maxims about milk into our zinc-enriched zen zone.

I hope you enjoy, relax, and maybe pour yourself a bowl of something sweet—if you have a bowl of Waffle Crisp, savor it fondly and tenderly. We plan to be back with another episode in just a couple weeks’ time, so if you have any discussion ideas or questions you’d like to hear about, fling ’em to our inbox.

*I’m pretty Sailor Uranus, with a Saturnal twist.

**Unless you’re a big Carnation Breakfast Essentials fan, in which case, you may to purée our podcast before consuming.

Quick: have you thought about cereal today?

Sure, we’ve all been dreaming of Cocoa Puffs since 9am (just minutes after finishing our morning Cocoa Krispies), but I mean really thinking about cereal. Like, contemplating the nihilistic ramifications of a world wear slightly torn cereal boxes will never close again.

It can be tough to squeeze this kind of munchable meditation into our everyday lives, so if you need a little spiritual spoon guidance, let Justin McElroy and I be your yummy yogis (I can keep this alliteration up all day) with episode 2 of The Empty Bowl.

For those out of the Froot Loop, The Empty Bowl is a 15-25 minute discussion about the latest and greatest in breakfast cereal. It’s packed with positive reinforcement and relaxing tones, so you can enjoy breakfast—or the dreadful first hour after lunch—in extra crispy peace.

In this episode, we look at some of the holiday cereal news that’s already breaking through all the Hallo-headlines, walk through my recent experience with a Cap’n Crunch Blender, and regale you kind listeners with the history and future of Pop-Tart Cereal.

If that sounds like your cup of milk, you can enjoy the show above, or use this link to subscribe and support The Empty Bowl. Half of any generous donations go toward keeping this site afloat, and the other half will go to the Facing Hunger Foodbank in Huntington, WV.

My deepest thanks to everyone who has listened to, contributed to, rated, reviewed, or otherwise directed good vibes toward The Empty Bowl so far. I am simultaneously humbled by the feedback, encouraged to get over my fear of voice work, and inspired to keep creating a richer, calmer, and more enjoyable breakfast experience for cereal heads across the world.

So as the old saying goes: Don’t forget to drink the milk—or chug a Cap’n Crunch Blender.