Tag Archives: 7 rating

Review: Honey Nut Cheerios Medley Crunch Cereal

Think, Dan. Think.

Think about armed guards. Think about snowy fortresses. Think about architectural impossibilities that couldn’t be understood even by the likes of Leonardo DiCaprio and Ellen Page. Okay, it’s no use: I give up.

That was my honest attempt at trying to protect my thoughts from being tampered with again. Like what’s-his-face-who-isn’t-Leo in Inception, I have reason to believe that someone can read my subconscious. And that someone works at General Mills.

See, this review is for the Big G’s intriguing Honey Nut Cheerios Medley Crunch. As I poured my bowl for review purposes and took the inaugural spoonful, I quickly realized that I had eaten a cereal like this before. But this was no cereal you would find on store shelves. No, this cereal—whose doppelgänger I held before me—was a product of my own ideation. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 7 rating, cheerios, general mills. 4 Comments

Aug. ’15

Review: Kellogg’s Origins Ancient Grains Blend Touch of Honey Cereal

Hey Brendan Fraser, are you listening? Because boy, have I got a role for you!

At least that was my first thought after reading the long-winded name of Kellogg’s Origins Ancient Grains Blend Touch of Honey. Something about it makes it feel like the title of a lost sequel in The Mummy franchise, in which an unsuspecting archaeologist investigates the mysterious origins of an ancient people made entirely of anthropomorphized grain.

But there’s no bandaged mascots or occult monsters to be found here (sorry, Yummy Mummy fans!): just a cereal chock-full of earthy, grainy flavor. Oh, and honey. But just a touch of it. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 7 rating, kelloggs. 7 Comments

Aug. ’15

Review: Kashi Sweet Potato Sunshine Cereal

Black Friday must have gone too far this time.

Since the shop-and-stomp bonanza keeps starting earlier and earlier—now beginning well into Thanksgiving Day—our favorite turkey munching holiday has also been forced to start early. Over 3 months early, in fact.

At least, this is the only reasonable explanation I can think of that Kashi Sweet Potato Sunshine cereal is already on store shelves. Because this cereal tastes like Thanksgiving dinner in your cereal bowl. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 7 rating, kashi. 1 Comment

Jul. ’15

Review: Trader Joe’s Toasted Oatmeal Flakes Cereal

Wait, wait! Come back!

I know what you’re thinking:

“Toasted Oatmeal Flakes? That sounds like the kind of boring cereal that’s been sitting in the back of my grandma’s pantry since the Great Depression forced people to hand-toast their oatmeal. I almost fell asleep halfway through reading the word OatmZzzZz…”

But your weirdly specific thought would be wrong. Because these are good. So good that, somewhere in the ghostly beyond, the Quaker Oats guy is shaking his fist and bellowing:

“Why didn’t I think of this first?!” Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 7 rating, trader joe's. 23 Comments

Jul. ’15

Review: Corn Pops Cereal (American vs. Canadian)

Canada Day occurred this past week, and this weekend marks the much-beloved American Independence Day (you can tell it’s July 4^th solely by the collective sound of several million ketchup bottles squelching their tomato-y innards in unison over millions more hot dogs and hamburgers). But this is Cerealously, not “Catching Up with Ketchup,” so let’s talk about what really matters.

I was lucky enough to spend this past week on vacation with my family that has become a loving American-Canadian hybrid. What this meant was that the pantry shelves were packed tight with snacks of both origins, a union which I viewed as an edible symbol of our countries’ goodwill. I mean, is there anything more beautiful than learning French as you eat?

Bilingualism: it’s what’s for breakfast. Continue reading →

Posted by dan g.. Categories: Reviews. Tags: 7 rating, kelloggs. 8 Comments