(Image via ebay.com/usr/retiredin07)

Brrr.

Gotta act fast. Every word I type in this post brings winter a little closer. Tm t gt rd f vwls.

Okay, I’ll just get to the point: Trader Joe’s is boldly and coldly choosing to be among the first breakfast bringers to roll out some holiday offerings, brazenly stealing the spotlight from the pumpkin spice divas just meters away.

I sense a cat fight. Somebody call Tony!

https://www.instagram.com/p/BnrWBAQhGjV/?taken-by=theimpulsivebuy

Joe Kringle’s first gift is Hot Cocoa Organic Frosted Toaster Pastries. I was first clued in to its landing by The Impulsive Buy’s earlier post introducing the pastries to the broader world. Since my closest Trader Joe’s requires a brown-bagged lunch and at least one bathroom stop to make it roundtrip, I took to trolling the web for more details, images and thoughts on the decidedly loaferish pastries’ flavor.

That how’s I found an eBay listing for two boxes of the pastries, which I hope boast as much chocolate marshmallow taste as Pop-Tarts Chocomallow Sundae Pop-Tarts, and not as much eau de cardboard as Trader Joe’s cereal take on the pairing.

(Image via ebay.com/usr/retiredin07)

Why I thought this listing was especially interesting is because the two boxes are each half the size of the one posted on TIB. And the nutrition facts even list the entire package’s caloric contents, which is startling enough to give Hungry Man mashed & buttered goosebumps. Whether this is a sample box or a different release is unknown, but if you want to own a possible toaster pastry myth, be prepared to pay about $3 per chocolate-stuffed rectangle.

Could be worth it: who knows, maybe they’re wood-fired?