Review: Peanut Butter Schoolyard Snacks

Schoolyard Snacks Peanut Butter Cereal Review Pouch

If there’ve been two themes in my pantry lately, it’s pouches and “grown-up” cereals. Between paltry serving sizes and keto fails, these haven’t been all that exciting, either.

So instead of reciprocally indulging in a mixing bowl of chocolate-syrup-slathered Cosmic Brownie bites—there’ll be plenty of time for that later—why not double down with a grown-up pouched cereal? A regular kangaroo of a breakfast, if you will.

Now, Schoolyard Snacks—formerly known as Cereal School—isn’t really an adult-stomached new kid on the block. But they offered to send me a sample of their Peanut Butter cereal variety, and in the interest of healthier cereal completionism, here we are.

With that, I’ll again clarify that I don’t follow a keto diet by any starchy stretch of the imagination. Therefore, my taste buds aren’t all-that attuned to alternative ingredients like those in Peanut Butter Schoolyard Snacks. However, having tried a fair number of adult cereals now, I feel I can give a reasoned perspective on how this release compares to other brands in the keto-sphere.

In short, if your palate is used to keto foodstuffs, then just add 2 points to whatever score I give these at the end. Now, lend me your eyes and stomach, dear reader: class is in session. 

Schoolyard Snacks Peanut Butter Cereal Review

Honestly, I know they changed it only because they started selling cheese puffs, too, but “Schoolyard Snacks” feels like a much better name for this stuff, simply since it feels a lot more like a snack than a cereal. And I mean that in a good way.

See, the texture of these PB Schoolyard Snacks is extremely light and crispy—in fact, it’s not unlike those Cheez Balls stores sell by the shimmeringly greasy gallon tub.

The best part about Peanut Butter Schoolyard Snacks is definitely the robust authenticity of roasted peanut flavor. Like extremely wholesome-ified Cracker Jacks, this cereal leads with legumes from first sniff to final bite. As a result, it tastes more salty or savory than it does sweet, making this a great option for, well, snacking by the handful.

As wonky aftertastes are almost always the bane of adult cereals’ existence, I’m impressed how neutral PB Schoolyard Snacks stays. With a milk protein and tapioca fiber base, it’s a deliberately unremarkable core taste that lets the nuttiness shine brighter than Mr. Peanut chucked under a zamboni.

It’s not all sunshine and industrially buffed monocles, though. I have a few bones to pick with these Schoolyard Snacks. Or rather, I have a few hunks of molar-entrenched tapioca to Aquapick. This stuff can get stuck in your teeth pretty easily if you’re not careful. Granted, that’s not an awful con, but I have two other small hesitances. For one thing, I didn’t enjoy Peanut Butter Schoolyard Snacks nearly as much in milk. Milk seems to unnecessarily temper the savory notes I enjoyed, while bringing out some of the more vegetable-y aftertastes that peanut oil so efficiently masked when eaten dry.

And most of all, I think the price of these will hold some people back. You can order value packs of anywhere from twelve to forty-eight pouches (and mix & match with the brand’s other flavors, Cocoa, Fruity, Cinnamon Bun + Cookies & Cream), but at best you’ll be paying $1.69 a pouch. And with each pouch constituting one decently sized bowl of cereal, this stuff is a bit costly even compared to other premium cereal brands.

Ultimately, though, I enjoyed dry Peanut Butter Schoolyard Snacks and would recommend it to the keto-minded to whom price isn’t an issue. I can’t speak for Schoolyard Snacks’ other varieties, but it’s up there with Three Wishes and certain flavors of Magic Spoon in the top tier of grown-up cereals I’ve tried.

Now if only Schoolyard Snacks could switch receptacles so I can continue my blanket boycott of needlessly pouched products. Might I suggest a big honkin’ ten-gallon tub that glistens like an oil puddle?


The Bowl: Schoolyard Snacks Peanut Butter Cereal

The Breakdown: Makes a better savory dry snack than a sweet milked cereal, but these PB puffs are genuinely nutty and, for keto dieters, worth the nosh—if you’ve got the dosh.

The Bottom Line: 6 well-polished peanutmen out of 10

2 responses »

  1. Schoolyard Snacks taste like cardboard. They are disgusting. You can get a very small refund but you need to jump through hoops and spend more money to get very little back.

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