I firmly believe that everyone has a “spirit Pop-Tart.” A spirit Pop-Tart is the specific toaster pastry flavor that represents you on a personal, philosophical, and even spiritual level. A spirit Pop-Tart has bits of your personality baked into every crumb.

While I love assigning other people spirit Pop-Tarts—like I’m some wise breakfast oracle on a Greek mountaintop—I’ve always got mixed readings on what my spirit Tart is. I like to see myself as a Milk Chocolate Graham Pop-Tart, but others have named me a PB&J Pop-Tart, a Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Pop-Tart, or even a Limited Edition Ice Cream Shoppe Frosted Ice Creme Sandwich Pop-Tart.

I got tired and hungry just typing that last one.

But the second Kellogg’s announced its partnership with Dunkin’ Donuts—wherein the pair would craft not one, but two (the other’s Chocolate Mocha) new Pop-Tarts inspired by coffee beverages—my friends pointed at me with excitedly, confident that I am a Vanilla Latte Pop-Tart!

I don’t know why they say this, exactly: I like to think it’s because I’m sweet and trendy, but it’s probably because I’m always caffeinated and have a hairdo that looks like freshly frothed milk.

Time to Go Nuts for Dunkin’ Donuts Vanilla Latte Pop-Tarts

And speaking of fresh, boy howdy do these Pop-Tarts smell fresh. I purposely used a grandmotherly exclamation like “boy howdy,” because every Vanilla Latte pastry smells like my grandma started baking cookies in the middle of a crowded Tim Hortons. I better dive in before Grams gets thrown out with a restraining order.

Have you ever dipped a Hostess Coffee Cake into an English Toffee cappuccino before? If not, you’ve never had the true “gas station breakfast at 4 A.M.” experience. But if you want to save yourself the bleary eyes and searing hot spills, you can just eat a Vanilla Latte Pop-Tart instead. The crust is standard Pop-Tart fare—fluffy, buttery, and floury enough to make crumb-speckled Mt. Rushmore dioramas—but this pastry’s delightful marriage of sweet icing and complexly cake-flavored filling roasts most other Pop-Tarts out of the room.

While the coffee flavor is fairly mild (picture a French Vanilla K-Cup with a heaping scoop of International Delight), it’s layered with notes of butterscotch, cinnamon, and caramelized molasses—the last of which nearly made my gingerbread man-shaped heart happily pop a gumdrop button. Meanwhile, the white squiggled frosting is creamy and smooth, making it the sweetly simple icing on top of an already satisfactory coffee cake.

But no one drinks a vanilla latte at room temperature, so let’s get the toaster a-brewin’. My toasted Vanilla Latte Pop-Tart comes out of its percolator dripping sweet filling from every fractured squiggle. All those flavors I talked about earlier are now uniformly melded together. It may not be as sophisticatedly layered, but a toasted Vanilla Latte Pop-Tart still oozes as much class as it does custard-colored goo.

With the icing melted into the filling, the previously coffee creamer-esque vanilla takes on a barrel-aged, browned bourbon bean taste. It’s more like crème brûlée than a Hostess Coffee Cake now, but hey: even Twinkie the Kid has to grow up eventually.

Needless to say, I’m a big flan of this flavor. And no, that wasn’t a typo.

Since I always try my Pop-Tarts frozen, I tried a Vanilla Latte Pop-Tart frozen. I hoped it would taste like coffee ice cream, and it totally tasted like coffee ice cream.

Oh, did you expect a long, poetic flavor description? Sorry, but this frozen pastry tastes so much like coffee ice cream that I’m imagining myself slapping a scoop of Ben & Jerry’s Coffee Coffee BuzzBuzzBuzz between two chilled Vanilla Latte Pop-Tarts, like it’s a hipster ice cream sandwich.

As I search for my keys, wallet, and grocery store rewards card so I can make that dream a reality, let me wrap up my thoughts on these Tarts. Even though the coffee and vanilla flavors are sadly the least prominent, the rest of a Vanilla Latte Pop-Tart tastes like a Greatest Hits collection of three other Pop-Tarts’ best features: Sugar Cookie‘s custardy dough, Gingerbread’s spice, and everything nice about a Brown Sugar Cinnamon.

I look forward to slowly “sipping” a hot ‘n’ toasty Vanilla Latte pastry next to the fire all winter long, while watching the snow fall and (hopefully) someone else shovel my driveway.

The “Bowl:” Kellogg’s Limited Edition Dunkin’ Donuts Frosted Vanilla Latte Pop-Tart

The Breakdown: Light on raw coffee taste and sadly decaffeinated, Vanilla Latte makes up for those potentially polarizing shortcomings by hosting a blissful butterscotch, toffee, and cappuccino battle royale inside its rectangular, vanilla-glazed pastry ring.

The Bottom Line: 9.5 “Twinkie the Senior Citizen” cartoons out of 10

(Quick Nutrition Facts: 200 calories, less than 1 gram of fiber, 16 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein per 1 pastry serving)

***Our friends over at Junk Banter and Snack Cellar sipped a tall mug’s worth of Vanilla Latte Pop-Tarts, too. Check out their reviews!***