The concept of doughnut holes will forever elude me. I mean, shouldn’t a serving of them just be empty? Can I return them, disgusted that I was served doughnut soil unearthed from the void that I paid for? Or should I just order a doughnut whole and buy a trowel?

Whatever, I need another bad fast food experience like I need a hole in my…uh…never mind.

The point is that Jack In The Box’s latest sweet treat takes their recently introduced doughnut holes from 🍩 to 100 (ce)real fast. Boasting a Not Fruity Pebbles—perhaps we should just call it Tooty Gravel? —coating so thick it’d make a packet of Fun Dip blush, these Fruity Cereal Milk Donut Holes are, well, Fruity Cereal Milk Donut Holes.

Unfortunately, I have no Jack In The Box locations near me, so until I can recruit a brunch of taste-testing helpers, I’ll have to live vicariously (and more freely vascular) through The Impulsive Buy’s review. After all, with an exterior sugar crust that looks like Funfetti-infused mold, what’s not to like?