Are we entering another renaissance of sugar sculpting?

Ever since the esteemed Marshelangallow crafted an anatomically accurate, marbled marbit miniature of the Statue of David, sacred cereal marshmallow geometry has only been going downhill. More cereals than ever may be phoning it in with simple, circular or cylindrical white marbits, but with new Tony-Inspired Marshmallows coming to Frosted Flakes, Kellogg’s may be chiseling in an enlightening new era for the craft—especially coming hot off the tail of chick & bunny ‘mallows in Peeps Cereal.

Here’s my theory: hearing our jeers toward their recent uninspired sugar ring cereals, Kellogg’s figured the next best way to cheaply add variety to familiar favorites would be to churn out a fresh menagerie of eye-catching marshmallows (while still using as few colors as possible). Now I’m not saying Tony’s new marbits are terribly impressive in a technical sense, but hopefully they’re squishy stepping stones to sucrose something-or-others with higher definition and articulation.

I need marshmallow gloves for my marshmallow action figure!

Here’s your morning’s starting marbit lineup: we’ve got Power Paws (are those what Tony uses to play his Nintendo Cereal System?), Sporty Scarves that I’m head-canonically calling Tony’s Tongues, whatever kind of auroral abstraction a Sweet Swirl is supposed to be, and the mug of the original Tiger King himself: Anthony T. Tiger…if he was the malformed caboose in a school of Goldfish crackers.

Are Tony-inspired marshmallows enough to make an already criminally cloying cereal more palatable? Maybe, but I guess we’ll have to wait and see after I get my own Powerless Paws on a box.