Warning: the below cereal is scary.
Terrifying.
Downright perturbing and petrifying.
Last chance to tuck in your inner child somewhere beneath your liver.
Okay, don’t say I didn’t warn you…
If you’re unsure why the above cereal box art sparks so much primal revulsion in the pits of my soul, you’ve got a few decades of creatively Choculated lore to catch up on. For so long, General Mills’ Monster Cereals—and especially Count Chocula, as their de facto fanged leader—have returned during the Halloween season with new charming box themes and art styles, making them reliably nostalgic accent pieces for any reboot-free horror movie marathon.
But ever since the Monster Cereals’ oat flour formula was infamously changed—a decision that likely fractured us into the darkest timeline—their theming has gotten as inspired as the Children of the Corn franchise. At least to me, it feels like a palpable loss of innocence, especially since 2013’s gave false hope by bringing back Frute Brute and Yummy Mummy for just one year.
And this latest box is just another example. Recycling the same art style from last year, Count Chocula 2019’s biggest “perk” is a host of pumpkin stencils featuring both the three main Monsters and several Addams Family characters—but unlike Cap’n Crunch, no stencil is included on the back of the box. Instead you must go online and download them (the website, MonsterCarving.com, is not yet live)…which doesn’t really feel like a prize inside.
More like an unpleasant surprise inside.
The back of the box here goes all in on the Addams Family partnership. To this box’s advertorial credit, I had no idea there was a 2019 reboot of that series on the way, so at least the studio’s partnership with General Mills will likely be financially benefitting.
But the rest of us without movie-popcorn-bucket-deep pockets are forced to play a “spot the design gaffes game,” which, even if you can tear your eyes away from the anatomically distressing status of Count Chocula’s chin, is kind of a cop out. Not only are the answers written right there on the side of the panel, rather than upside-down or on the box’s bottom, but of the “8 tricky mistakes” we’re asked to spot, *SPOILER ALERT* three of them involve the clock.
Like, c’mon, you couldn’t’ve thrown us a few bones with a pair of palette-swapped Brute ‘n’ Mummy skeletons?
Perhaps I’m overreacting, and in reality this approach was kind of expected at this point, but I still believe that the proud legacies of Count Chocula, Franken Berry, and Boo Berry deserve better. General Mills even debuted frameworks to crowd-source a Monsters movie, which suggested renewed interest in their lineage—but now plans appear to be lurching forward.
We haven’t seen Frank & Boo’s boxes yet, but I think it’s fair to assume they won’t be much different. My thanks to Mike H. for sharing these photos, even if it’s a bit of a hollow win for Monster Cereal marks everywhere.
Picked up a box out of curiosity, thinking how bad could the it be?
It is basically like rigid packing material. And family size proportions so I’ve got a long stretch of sad mornings ahead.
I agree with everyone else on this issue “!!!! I would love to buy a ton of them if only they would bring back the original version of the best version of the Monster family members who taste so good and I consider it a great comfort food “!!! So GM”” PLZ FOR THE LOVE GREAT TASTIN CEREAL ” GOD BLESS YOU ALL TODAY SHALOM
They didn’t change the recipe for any health reasons. Like most products in the last 30 years, they simply cheaped out and use corn flour and corn syrup because corn is so heavily subsidized by the government. Farmers get paid to throw corn crops away, so it is dirt cheap. They won’t use more expensive ingredients because they’re only interested in selling boxes. Even the whole new Coke thing in the 80’s was just a ruse to switch from cane sugar to corn syrup in US markets. It sickening.
General Mills is too cheap to change the formula back to oat flour, I’m never buying this cheap corn crap again. Restore the glory GM!! Bring back the original formula!!!
Unfortunately, that doesn’t seem to be sending General Mills any messages by us not buying the cereal. Cereal companies stocks are way down these days and they still don’t listen to what the consumers want. If cereal companies stopped trying to make cold cereal healthier and went back to making it taste better, I’d imagine cereal sales would increase again. But most people think the new formulas taste like cardboard.
Steve- I agree, but GM just released the Fillows cereals and they have the most sugar of any cereal on the market. There has to be something more going on with the Monsters brand. I think it is definitely a financial issue, they just can’t bring themselves to take the necessary steps to reproduce the classic formula because they don’t think it would equate to a larger profit. I and many others obviously disagree. I know if they ever offered the original formula, they would triple the annual sales that the current corn based Monsters provide. Restore the glory General Mills!!!
I wrote them about doing Frute Brute Fruit Gushers and Fruity Yummy Mummy Froot by the Foot if they can’t be bothered making cereal. I know they make halloween versions of those, just slap Frute Brute and Ymmu Mummy on them!
That’s a good idea. At least if they gave us something new with those characters. Or even create a new Monster cereal to add to the bunch. I can’t believe they haven’t done a Witch or lagoon creature or bride of Frankenberry cereal yet. You’d think they’d especially try a female mascot cereal since all of the 5 are male monsters.
So bummed they still haven’t brought back Yummy Mummy and Frute Brute since 2013. I even reached out to General Mills marketing team back in 2017 and they told me that both re-releases did really well back in 2013 but they never gave me a reason why they aren’t bringing them back again. Not sure why General Mills wants to reduce cereal sales by not giving the people want they want. And after reading in the news on a regular basis that major cold cereal manufacturer brands are way down in the stock market. And they wonder why.
These cereals haven’t been the same since they changed the formula. My hope (though not holding my breath) is that they go back to the old formula for a season to give us older fans of the cereal a little bit of our childhood back, and to let the younger fans get an idea of what this cereal should really taste like