(UPDATE: I reviewed Chocolate Frosted Flakes with Skeleton Marshmallows! I also reviewed Caramel Apple Pop-Tarts!)
Deep breaths, Dan. It’s only August. It’s still not socially acceptable to wear a vampire costume into work, and if you try trick-or-treating tonight, you’ll be lucky to post bail by October 31st.
But oh, brother, is it hard to not get swept up in Halloween spirit already, especially when Kellogg’s latest press release announced their full Fall lineup, including the new Frosted Caramel Apple Pop-Tarts & Chocolate Frosted Flakes with Skeleton Marshmallows cereal seen above.
The lineup also includes the previously leaked Special K Pumpkin Spice Crunch and Pumpkin Spice Nutri-Grain Bars (maybe we’ll finally see a Nutri-Grain review on this blog?), and it also confirmed that Pumpkin Spice Frosted Mini-Wheats, Special K Apple Cinnamon Crunch, Pumpkin Pie Pop-Tarts, and Pumpkin Spice Fudge Stripes will all be returning this year.
But these two new, fruity and skeletal treats are easily the most exciting products of the bunch. All these snacks are hitting shelves this month, and I look forward to rapidly eating them to the point of satisfied nausea. Just like I did with my candy on Halloween night.
Back in April, I scored an exclusive photo of a Caramel Apple Pop-Tart, and now we have the box art to match the rumors. I commend Kellogg’s for choosing green Granny Smith apples for their neon icing drizzle (which reminds me of the carpet in a bowling alley) instead of Red Delicious, and I hope it brings a puckering, tart bite to pair with the sweet caramel.
The box art also confirms that the filling comes in ribboned shades of brown. I have no idea what the implications of this are, but I do know that come October, I’ll be filling an old-timey bucket with these pastries and bobbing for them while blindfolded.
As for Chocolate Frosted Flakes with Skeleton Marshmallows, they aren’t actually new so much as they are a Frankenstein combination of old cereal bits. Chocolate Frosted Flakes (also known as Choco Zucaritas) aren’t the easiest cereal to find on shelves, but they do exist. The skeleton marshmallows, meanwhile, made their debut last Halloween in Froot Loops and Apple Jacks.
I wasn’t terribly thrilled with normal Frosted Flakes with Marshmallows, but this cereal has me happily envisioning pillow cases full of Mallo Cups. Better yet, all I’d have to do is toss in Golden Grahams (and maybe a little liquid smoke) for a taste of late summer s’mores.
Cereal aside, I’m excited about the mail-in flashlights teased on the Frosted Flakes box. They appear to come in 4 varieties, with each beaming an image of Tony the Tiger, a Pop-Tart, our lovable Rice Krispies boys, or Toucan Sam. I hope we get to choose, because I’ve never wanted anything more than to fall asleep under the grinning glow of an iridescent, anthropomorphized toaster pastry.
It would take “sweet dreams” to a whole new level.
(Product images via Kellogg’s. And once again, special thanks to Candy Hunting for tipping me off about the photos.)
The pumpkin pie pop tarts are already back! My brother brought me them!
This is going to come off as incredibly divisive.
Still, I have to say it. Burn me at the stake it you must.
Marshmallows are an abomination outside of Lucky Charms.
I think in general I agree with you, with the exceptions being Madagascar S’Mores Jungle Party and Count Chocula’s chocolate flavored marshmallows.
Oh crap now I’m a hypocrite. I totally forgot about Count Chocula. I guess what I’m saying is I’m sick of this Taco Bellization of cereal; this should not be some permutation and combination game of sticking already developed components into different bases.
Give me something new. Instead of raisins I want dried figs. Instead of fake chocolate shavings I want cream cheese bites. Instead of chocolate frosted flakes I want white chocolate.
Give me carrot cake flavored cereal or give me death.
How about a revived Oreo O’s with cream cheese bites? Heck, I’d fly to North Korea if it meant getting a box of that.