What’s October without a good reanimation story?

Remember Post’s Mini Cinnamon Churros, a 2011 cult favorite cereal featuring fun-sized toasted churro pieces? If you don’t, that’s okay—it seems to have had unreliable regional availability through much of its 3-4ish-year lifespan. But if you remember it fondly or feel like you’ve read a Thrillist article about it, it seems the cereal’s crunchy cinnamon spirit may be living on.

The Cerealously Intelligence Agency (not to be confused with the Crunchling Independence Alliance) has discovered a listing for “Cinnamon Toast Crunch Churros Cereal.” Alas, there’s no image to shed light on what such a name would entail, but my early prediction is that it could just be a spiritual successor to Cinnamon Star Crunch, which just tasted like Cinnamon Toast Crunch-slathered corn puff stars. Except this time, the pieces would look less like stars, and probably something like Like Likes.

So while you may think a General Mills cereal could never inherit the legacy of Post’s Mini Cinnamon Churros, I’ve conspiracy-theoried that they’re more closely linked. Mini Cinnamon Churros say right on the box that they’re encouraging direct comparison to Cinnamon Toast Crunch, so if Mini Chinnamon Churros is a reflection of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, then Cinnamon Toast Crunch Churros is another reflection, but this time a darker reflection…(pause for dramatic tension and tin foil hate adjustment)…An invasive mutation, even.

Or maybe it’s just a delicious cereal. Or maybe it won’t make it to shelves. We all have our own theories.

Either way, if you know anything more about this cereal—or any new cereal—you can submit it here for a chance to see it here.

Could these be the two snack cake sages prophesied in the Snackronomicon? The pair of hybrid snack cake-cereals who would cast down the floodgates that prevent other delicious crossovers from overwhelming humanity’s taste buds (or so they say)? Could Hostess be ready to usher in a new cosmic turn around the great Big Wheel of Life?

My snack cake mythology may be as dusty as a pair of bottom shelf gas station Sno-Balls, but I’m nevertheless whipped into a Fruit Pie-ous frenzy by the cereal rumor mill’s latest harvest: product listings for not one, but two cereals from America’s most iconic snack cake brand. Hostess Honey Bun Cereal and Hostess Donette Powdered Sugar Mini Donut Cereal both exist in a reputable space, but unfortunately without any photo ID just yet.

Not wanting to stop there, I sought further confirmation that this unlikely duo was actually coming. After all, choosing Honey Buns and Donettes over Hostess’ cornerstone cakes—Twinkies and Cupcakes would be the logical creamy candidates—seems a bit strange. However, I could also understand the difficulty of either translating Twinkies’ nuanced flavor into a cereal or trying to make yet another chocolate marshmallow cereal exciting. But despite any early trepidation—I don’t want another Freedom Crunch on my hands—I’m a bit more confident about these cereals’ legitimacy after stumbling upon…this.

(Image via HoorayforHostess.com)

Yep, a prototype web game featuring a “Hooray for Hostess Cereal!” tag and a minimalist Asteroids rip-off about a cereal bowl fighting ghoulishly gaping Donette debris. The site was privately registered three months ago, giving credence to a corporate origin rather than some avant-garde game developer who trolls cereal information for design inspiration.

Unfortunately that’s all I know about these possible Hostess Cereals. If you find out any other news, I humbly invite you to share. But for now, I’m gonna use this post to convince Little Debbie to pull the trigger on Cosmic Brownie Pop-Tarts.

(Image via ebay.com/usr/retiredin07)

Brrr.

Gotta act fast. Every word I type in this post brings winter a little closer. Tm t gt rd f vwls.

Okay, I’ll just get to the point: Trader Joe’s is boldly and coldly choosing to be among the first breakfast bringers to roll out some holiday offerings, brazenly stealing the spotlight from the pumpkin spice divas just meters away.

I sense a cat fight. Somebody call Tony!

https://www.instagram.com/p/BnrWBAQhGjV/?taken-by=theimpulsivebuy

Joe Kringle’s first gift is Hot Cocoa Organic Frosted Toaster Pastries. I was first clued in to its landing by The Impulsive Buy’s earlier post introducing the pastries to the broader world. Since my closest Trader Joe’s requires a brown-bagged lunch and at least one bathroom stop to make it roundtrip, I took to trolling the web for more details, images and thoughts on the decidedly loaferish pastries’ flavor.

That how’s I found an eBay listing for two boxes of the pastries, which I hope boast as much chocolate marshmallow taste as Pop-Tarts Chocomallow Sundae Pop-Tarts, and not as much eau de cardboard as Trader Joe’s cereal take on the pairing.

(Image via ebay.com/usr/retiredin07)

Why I thought this listing was especially interesting is because the two boxes are each half the size of the one posted on TIB. And the nutrition facts even list the entire package’s caloric contents, which is startling enough to give Hungry Man mashed & buttered goosebumps. Whether this is a sample box or a different release is unknown, but if you want to own a possible toaster pastry myth, be prepared to pay about $3 per chocolate-stuffed rectangle.

Could be worth it: who knows, maybe they’re wood-fired?