I admit it: I’m a fraud.

See, I often claim that this is a blog about “cereal, Pop-Tarts, and oatmeal,” but I haven’t written a word about oatmeal since mid-2018—let alone other hot cereals. Sorry, Cream of Wheat, but I just don’t think we’re going to work out.

There are a couple reasons for my oatmeal abstinence. Logistically, I both don’t hear about new oatmeals often, plus in the breakfast aisle it’s way harder to notice new oatmeal varieties, since brands like Quaker will use the same box design with small element swaps.

But more importantly, I simply can’t get as excited about new strains of oatmeal as I can about new cereals. Oatmeal just lacks the crunch, potency, and childlike goofiness that makes cereal so fun—and don’t even get me started on how hard it is to take an attractive picture of beige mush. Like a school photographer, I find myself grimacing through the steamed-up lens, thinking “Oh. Great. You’re looking, so…eager,” as my oatmeal slogs its way through the $100 picture package its parents paid for.

Aesthetic tepidity aside, oatmeal is back in a sleek and minimalistic way with these RX A.M. Oats cups. Armed with four cutely cupped flavors—Chocolate, Apple Cinnamon, Maple, and Vanilla Almond—I’m here to take some moist glamour shots and see if these high-protein, low-ingredient cups can stand oat-to-oat with the feeble Quaker guy and his flimsy packets. Continue reading →