The leftover milk at the bottom of the bowl is the unsung hero of breakfast cereal. Infused with the eroded sugary essence of a million flakes, loops, pebbles, or maple Parisian bread slices, this swirlingly sweet milk is so good that I even unknowingly coined* a term for it: “endmilk.”
*By “coined,” I mean that I always thought endmilk was the stuff’s proper taxonomic name, until spellcheck’s angry red squiggle told me otherwise
But now instead of being an oft-forgotten appendix to breakfast that some people even (*gasp*) pour down the drain, cereal milk is becoming dessert’s decadent guest of honor, as Ben & Jerry’s has debuted three new Cereal Splashback flavors inspired by iconic cereals and their endmilk: Continue reading →
♪ New York, New York: a helluva town. The Bronx is up, and the new café serving blended toaster pastry milkshakes is down! ♪
Sorry if there are any unexpected typos or short circuits in this post. My mouth is watering like Niagara, and my keyboard’s in the splash zone. But how could I not be spilling anticipatory drool by the barrelful when Pop-Tarts keeps tempting us with photos and videos of their Pop-Tarts Café?
Open until March 12th in New York City, this pop-up (pun intended, I’m sure) shop is the spiritual successor to Kellogg’s earlier cereal café. But the Pop-Tarts Café amps up the customization and Wild Berry wackiness far beyond the cereal joint’s wildest dreams. I’d you can’t watch the video above, know that their menu contains: Continue reading →
Why am in such an urgent pancake panic, you ask? Well our Instagram friends money0351 and Oreo Hunters tipped us off about Cap’n Crunch’s Blueberry Pancake Crunch, and just looking at it above makes my blood syrup levels plummet. I’m gonna need a buttermilk IV to keep my system from going into griddlecake gridlock.
Though Cap’n Crunch’s recent, drool-inducing tweet might’ve been a hint, I did not see this one coming. Just like with last summer’s Orange Creampop Crunch, it’s nearly impossible to predict what the good Cap’n’s next obscure dessert-flavored cereal will be these days. Blueberry Pancake Crunch could’ve just as easily been Maple Bacon Crunch, Syrup-Glazed Sweet Potato Crunch, or Chicken & Waffles Crunch.
Sorry, I still have maple leaves stuck in my mind—stuck with syrup, that is.
Apparently the cereal has already been spotted at Walmart and Albertsons, and it will have a nationwide release soon. Once my French toast frenzy has calmed down into a manageable flapjack fantod, you’d better believe I’m going to drive off looking for it. No rain, sleet, snow, or cloudy with a chance of meatball is going to stop me. Hey, there’s my prediction for Cap’n Crunch’s next cereal: “Spaghetti & Meatball Crunch.”
Endless thanks (even more endless than IHOP’s all-you-can-eat pancakes) go to money0351 and Oreo Hunters for the tip. If you’d like to share a fresh cereal scoop, click yourself right on over to our submissions page, or just email us at cerealously.net@gmail.com. There’s a good chance your picture could be featured on the site.
It’s about time Post put Fred & Barney back squarely in the cardboard spotlight.
Yeah, yeah, I know: new Cinnamon Pebbles cereal, coming from Post in January 2017, sounds exciting and delicious and all, but the real news here is that the new cereal monarchy of Pebbles & Bamm-Bamm is finally over. While The Flintstones’ Fred & Barney still grace the front of Fruity Pebbles and Cocoa Pebbles, those two rascally rugrats Pebbles & Bamm-Bamm always get to appear on new Pebbles cereals: from Sugar Cookie Pebbles to Poppin’ Pebbles and Marshmallow Fruity Pebbles.
Why? Do troglodytic infants statistically sell more cereal? Or does Pebbles think she has a contractual entitlement to every cereal featuring her name?
Either way, good ol’ Fred & Barn are here to stay: Post has already stated that Cinnamon Pebbles will permanently join Fruity and Cocoa on shelves. About 12 years ago, the brand released Cinna-Crunch Pebbles, but those quickly went the way of the dinosaur. The scientific jury is still out on whether poor sales or a grocery aisle meteorite pushed Cinna-Crunch Pebbles off shelves.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2R4EPI6jE7c
There are so many other unanswered questions, too. Even though the box says “Cinnamon Sweet Taste,” does the giant cinnamon stick on the front mean it will have some unique heat? Will Post reuse the same flavor formula from their discontinued cult favorite Mini Cinnamon Churros cereal? And with Cinnamon Pebbles suddenly competing with Kellogg’s brand new Cinnamon Frosted Flakes, will Cap’n Crunch and Jean LaFoote’s Cinnamon Crunch cereal return from the ’70s for an all-out cinnamon war?
Only time will tell. But I know one thing for sure: by the end of January, my New Year’s Resolutions and taste buds are both going to be burned raw by cinnamon goodness.
It’s the smell of jealousy—jealousy over Canada getting a cool exclusive cereal that America isn’t. It might also be the smell of warm, oven-baked banana bread wafting over the U.S.’s northern border, but you know, that’s kind of a “chicken and the egg” type thing.
See, I’m jealous because Post’s Banana Bread Shreddies are coming soon to Canadian grocery shelves in January 2017, and we here in the states have never been blessed by a doughy, ripe banana cereal. Sure, we’ve had strawberry banana Urkel Os and the surprisingly delicious Banana Berry Minions Cereal—which had notes of browned banana—but neither of those come close to the “Grandma’s kitchen goodness” promised by Banana Bread Shreddies. I’m still waiting for General Mills to realize Tiny Toast‘s potential for amazing bread-based flavor varieties.
This news comes courtesy of Jeff S., renowned Junk Food Dog and one-time Cerealously guest reviewer. I both thank Jeff for this tip and curse him for getting to bury his face in a banana bread-flavored breakfast when I can’t.
I’ll just have to use a real slice of banana bread to mop up my morning tears. After all, isn’t that the secret ingredient for keeping it dense and moist?
(Update: Cinnamon Frosted Flakes are in limited early release in Walmart, Meijer, and potentially other stores. We reviewed them here!)
Cinnamon Toast Crunch may be good, but can it see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Frosted Flakes?
No? Well I can’t see it either, because the only known photo of Kellogg’s upcoming Cinnamon Frosted Flakes—set to debut in 2017—is more pixellated than a game of Super Mario Bros. played on a Walmart security camera.
The picture’s blurriness made think it had marshmallows in it at first, but upon closer inspection, they are just incredibly aggressive splashes of milk. But I can’t blame the milk: wouldn’t you get a little jumpy too if a kaiju-sized Tony the Tiger was staring you down with the deranged hunger of Godzilla on Thanksgiving Day?
After Eggo’s recent Stranger Things smash success, Kellogg’s should brand this new natural product as “Made without Strange Things.”
(Image via Kellogg’s and FoodBusinessNews)
Oh, and there’s a new Special K Nourish Granola with Quinoa coming in 2017, too.In my opinion, this granola doesn’t have nearly enough terrifying, King Kong-esque felines on its packaging.
Move over, Pumpkin Spice Latte: there’re two new coffee-flavored treats coming in 2017…and neither of them are in beverage form.
Kellogg’s—continuing their apparent quest to turn everyliquidimaginable into a frosted rectangular sugar pocket filled with dough and goo—is set to debut two new toaster pastry varieties based on Dunkin’ Donuts drinks: Vanilla Latte Pop-Tarts and Chocolate Mocha Pop-Tarts. As you probably expected, the amazingly resourceful Candy Hunting broke the news, and I’m just here spreading the word like the more-crushed Pop-Tart in a foil-wrapped package of two. Seriously, go follow Candy Hunting and send her regards that are warmer than a Starbucks coffee.
Above is the only known photo of the elusive Tarts, and it’s unfortunately smaller than a Pop-Tarts Go-Tart. Because of this pixelation, it’s hard to hypothesize much about these Pop-Tarts—we can’t even tell if their graininess is whole grain! Vanilla Latte Pop-Tarts appear to have a cinnamon or almond-esque frosting (though it’s likely just darker vanilla) and what I can only hope is a steamed milk swirl (though it’s likely just vanilla cream, or worse: plain sugar). Chocolate Mocha Pop-Tarts, meanwhile, have a very frothy coating over a decadently dark brown base. I don’t think it’s realistic to expect dark chocolate, espresso, or dark roast coffee flavors—let alone a twinge of bittersweetness—but I will say that would make for the sexiest Pop-Tart ever.
I’m talking, “a candlelit pasta dinner cooked just for me and this Pop-Tart” levels of Pop-Tart romanticism.
Most importantly, we don’t whether these Dunkin’ Donuts Pop-Tarts are actually caffeinated, but I guess with all that sugar, getting any more energy from a Pop-Tart might leave my hands too shaky to hold a spaghetti-filled fork. Either way, I plan to do with these new Pop-Tarts the same thing I do with every coffee beverage: make it really hot and consume it so fast that I burn my tongue and regret all of my life choices.
A quick search on this site reveals that I’ve made hopeful jokes about Girl Scout cookie cereals before, from Thin Mints and Samoas to Tagalongs and Do-Si-Dos (sorry, Thanks-A-Lots and Trefoils: come back when you bring more than shortbread to the table).
My frequent referencing probably stems from my childhood love of those cartoon Girl Scout Cookie mascots, but it’s also true that in this world of political uncertainty and constant turmoil, we could all use a bowl of Girl Scout cookies for breakfast right about now. And now that news of General Mills two new Thin Mints and Caramel Crunch cereals has leaked, I can use the excuse that my repetitive humor wasn’t unoriginal—it was predictive.
Just call me Nostra-Dan-us.
The above photos were found onInfluenster by the ever-vigilant and wonderful Candy Hunting, so I encourage you to say thanks (and do yourself a favor) by dropping them a follow. It is currently unknown when these two crispy cookie delights will hit stores, but the very fact that they exist is reason enough to host a celebratory backyard campfire.
We’ll make s’mores using Thin Mints instead of Hershey’s bars.
Speaking of cookies, Thin Mints Cereal looks like a recolored, fudgier, and chip-less Cookie Crisp. At the same time, it’s poised to be the first mint chocolate cereal ever. Well, maybe the second—there was that one time I ate Oreo O’s then brushed my teeth right after.
And mere days after I pouted about America not having a caramel chocolate cereal like Europe’s Lion Cereal, Caramel Crunch emerged from the cereal ether to not only fill that void, but to potentially bring coconut into the flavor equation, too.
While it’ll be interesting to see how Thin Mints Cereal and Caramel Crunch Cereal compare to each other, there’s another breakfast showdown I’m more interested in. See, General Mills already has a cereal called Superman Caramel Crunch. So who will be the superior, caramelized king? Will the Man of Steel triumph? Will the guy who’s faster than a speeding bullet be bested by a bowl of these sugar-speckled cookies that look like beefy Cheerios? Or will Werther’s come out of nowhere and beat them both with a box of milk-friendly hard candies?
And the most important question of all: does this delightful news mean that General Mills is forgiven for their recent Sugar Cookie Toast Crunch snub? It’s probably too soon to tell, but if General Mills decided to announce a Peanut Butter Patty Cereal, too, I might be able to answer with a more decisive “yes.”
