The breakfast aisle is guerrilla warfare. We have Malt-o-Meal cranking out hit after hit while Aldi’s in-house brand drops the surprise bomb of the holiday season. What the Cuphead is going on here?! I’m having ancestor-flashbacks to when an imitator started dressing like Hydrox and soon became America’s Favorite Cookie. So please, stick with me for a moment while I argue that the future very likely rests on the shoulders of companies we don’t even recognize.

Sometimes, I take a trip to the local hippie grocery chain to see what’s up in the world of avant granola. It was during one such venture that I spotted this perplexing bit of cerealia perched high up on a shelf in the ill-defined “healthy cereal” section. It stood out amid Barbara’s Puffins and Kashi GoLean because, more so than any other probiotic, low-sugar, organic, gluten-free, paleo, vegan option with 1000% of your daily fiber, the minimalist art shouts “wholesome.” Screams it. Through a megaphone. While standing in front of a celery poster. This is box art that could make Teddy Ruxpin burst into apologetic tears for not giving enough warm hugs to orphans.

Meet Wild Harvest, a brand with barely any discernible history or footprint in the marketplace. The enlarged image on their milquetoastly-named Blueberry Walnut Cereal looks a lot like one of the many pretenders to the Honey Bunches of Oats lineage. An investigation of the copyright reveals that Wild Harvest is an imprint of SuperValu, Inc. Inspired by Dan’s recent tumble down the rabbit bowl, I checked more into it. Here’s hoping I don’t need a secret handshake to get in.

It turns out that that SuperValu is a subsidiary of United Natural Foods, Inc. United is also the main distributor to Whole Foods Market, thereby cementing their scientifically-formulated wholesomeness pedigree. BWC is like the cereal incarnation of someone who fixes your toilet paper situation while over for a visit.

A name like Blueberry Walnut Cereal leaves little to the imagination, but one thing jumps out right away. Look that those flakes. Those are not normal. Even new releases from mainstream brands are composed of the same fundamental parts to form different editions of Voltron (e.g. putting marbits in Frosted Flakes does not a new cereal make), and yet these funky bunches of woke feature a completely re-engineered flake. Where HBOats is known for delicate little crisps, BWC has substantial slices of oat and rice. And the rice maintains its visibility, which is just perplexing to see. The concept may be old-fashioned, but things are definitely getting weird in Riverdale.

Unlike HBOats, the bunches don’t really steal the show on this one. They’re less sweet than the mainstream option, and much more numerous. Nearly half the bowl seems to be bunches. They have a very natural blueberry-and-oat flavor, too, which is unexpected given the dearth of dried blueberries. The first pour had just one single piece of fruit in it. Equally notable are the flakes. They’re sizeable, with more structural integrity than I’m used to in similar products and a texture most closely resembling baked Lays. Individually, the parts are unremarkable. Planeteer-like, though, their powers combine to form the missing link between granola and cereal that I didn’t know I wanted.

Milk is required. BWC’s bunches aren’t tooth-breakers by any means, but a liquid bath brings out subtle spicing, providing a blueberries-and-cream vibe. It also illuminates the reinforced flakes, which hold up heroically in milk, on an order I’ve not seen before. I hope Wild Harvest forgot to patent their Milk Resistance Shield, because even Raisin Bran could learn a step or two from this new kid on the block. Milk guides the flakes from crispy to perfectly chewy, with just enough density to satisfy. If the flavor is a passable middle-of-the-road, BWC’s mouthfeel is the archetype of hearty cereal made manifest. This is the cereal Plato ate.

So yes, fellow cereal heads, there is innovation happening out there. In a time of reboots and sequels, it may be that the big companies should start watching their backs. There are snipers in the (Wildberry) bushes and it’s only a matter of time before someone makes a nationwide distribution deal for an unsung regional product to reignite the Spoonic Wars.

The Bowl: Wild Harvest Blueberry Walnut Cereal

The Breakdown: Its toned-down sweetness won’t blow your socks off, but for in-milk texture and real, actual blueberry taste, this one will be hard to top.

The Bottom Line: 8 Feeny flakes out of 10