Monthly Archives: June 2022

Review: Honey Vanilla Cheerios

New Honey Vanilla Cheerios Review – Box

Ever wonder what a plain ol’ butter & jelly sandwich might taste like? What about simply sour chicken, an unadorned upside-down cake, or a pizza topped only with…pepper?

Yeah, me either. But that’s the Honey Vanilla Cheerios experience: like eating something extremely familiar, but without one of the signature, accenting somethings that define the dish. Granted, I’m exaggerating, and Honey Vanilla Cheerios don’t taste as bad as fouled fowl, but it’s palpably missing something.

And that something, dear reader, is Nut.

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Quick Review: Cookie Crisp Oatmeal

New Cookie Crisp Oatmeal Review.- Box

There are a couple of good (read: mostly lazy) reasons why I don’t review oatmeal on this blog too often.

1. It’s always so hot that I have trouble photographing it without steaming up my camera lens.

2. Oatmeal is such an ugly foodstuff that I have trouble photographing it without emphasizing just how ugly this grain slop really is.

3. I, uh, don’t own a microwave, so I’m forced to just pour hot milk (don’t even suggest water, you puritans) on it and hope for the best, which, in the case of instant oatmeals like Cookie Crisp Oatmeal, which straight up do not recommend my method, ends up invariably leaving me with a bowl of runny (and thus even uglier) mush.

But nevertheless, I endured these struggles for Chip the Wolf’s sake. And thus, here are my thoughts on Cookie Crisp Oatmeal: the good, the bad, and the inevitably ugly. Continue reading

Review: Trix Trax

Trix Trax Review – Box

Name: 10/10, would attempt to utter ten times tongue-twistingly fast in a public space, resulting in prompt institutionalization.

Box design: 10/10, love to imagine a world where a cartoon rabbit and a photorealistic Tyrannosaurus get into all kinds of Road Runner-y hijinks—and where said cereal-swiping Rabbit, with his forward-facing eyes, is no longer the alpha predator.

But the taste of Trix Trax? Well, let’s talk, squawk, and lumbering walk about it. Continue reading